I can't imagine a life where you only know one thing, and have mastered it the point where you're considered the best in the world at it. That was Alex Rodriquez's life for many years, and the stress of having to keep that up, of not knowing what else you could possibly do, must have been incredible. One passage that struck out to me in this was his relating the "best person in a field" to Babe Ruth. There isn't always a singular best person in a field, things don't always work like they do in sports where it's more clear cut who is the better player (seriously, look into sabermetrics in baseball, it's probably the most advanced system of any sport) and being unable to think about that in a different way.

So he can do no wrong. Early in his suspension it occurs to him with the force of revelation: My whole life, I've never been punished, never been told no -- until the 162.

Now this isn't something that is only related to A-Rod. Probably the most recent case is Johnny Manziel of the Cleveland Browns, or the cheating scandal at UNC, or countless other cases. It seems that many of these extraordinarily talented athletes have no problem getting what they want, and maybe more importantly, end up in situations where they are surround by yes men that enable them to continue with poor decisions and habits.

Each conversation is an interrogation. It's his process, it's how he interacts with the world. It's how he learns.

This is something I can relate to. Losing a father at a young age is a traumatic experience, and it really does influence and drastically alter how you end up looking at the world and how you can learn more about what it means to be a person of integrity, or whatever else it is you're looking for. I wonder how things would be different if he didn't have that upbringing. Would he still have ended up with the drive and ability to become so great at baseball? I hesitate to say yes.

I'm fascinated by his desire to educate himself and get a college education, and to try and be a more normal person. Throughout the entire article you still have to question if he's being genuine with anything he's saying, but I would like to think that he is for some of these things. Mainly the education and family related parts.

But when that voice stops speaking? The silence is like nothing you've ever heard, or not heard, and the loneliness is not unlike death, because it is a foretaste of death. He'd do anything to get it back.

Anything.

Maybe it's not simply about cheating. Maybe it's more complicated. Maybe's it's also not that complicated. If no one is more alive than the athlete in his prime, then no one understands the senescence that awaits us all better than the athlete suddenly not in his prime. Maybe every disgraced athlete is Dorian Gray, selling his soul to stay young, to retain his beauty and power. Hiding his true portrait from the world, he wakes one day in horror at the bargain he's struck.

Damn. Have a badge for that paragraph alone. Many sports fans like to forget the person behind the athlete. I was in the middle of reading this and was going to post it, but you beat me to it.