followed tags: 26
followed domains: 3
badges given: 19 of 21
member for: 949 days
When I started here I thought I was doing something wrong because there was not much content submitted. Not a lot of users, not a lot of content. Not everything I submit is gold, but in general the goal here is quality over quantity.
I think I've read enough to have a valid opinion and see where it's going unless the author had a stroke and it becomes a YA novel about dystopian iRaq all of a sudden.
Mostly it's the story of individuals, I can't remember how many (6?), and how they have been affected by the events in the region. He mentions some history and facts like Sykes Picot and the immolation of the merchant in Tunisia that set off the Arab Spring but it's not his goal to offer his opinion on anything.
I love hearing stories of people who have different experiences than me in general and, as someone who was optimistic about the Arab Spring as it happened and opposed to the Iraq War to the point that I believe it was an illegal, impeachable action, it's a great book.
Here's the entire original article:
I just wanted a hard copy because I didn't want to read that much on a screen.
Reading Fractured Lands about the implosion of the Arab world after the Iraq invasion and Arab Spring. I looked really hard for the New York Times Magazine with the original article in it. Not knowing that New York Times Magazine is a Sunday insert in the paper. I was pretty pleased that the author expanded the article into a book.
Thanks. I try not to tell anyone I care about about urges because it's not a big deal and I don't want them to worry.
But in the interest of hubski as a place to learn I'll explain the urges I get to people who will never be addicts. Being tired is apparently a trigger. When I got off work and was tired I'd drink a lot. As I am wont to do. Counterproductively because I would stay up later to drink more. I was kinda surprised by that but there are different layers to addiction. Like the physical act of putting liquid in my face is something I still do obsessively whether it's water or coffee or Dr Pepper, I'm just Pavlov style conditioned to drink stuff.
I'll just drive by a gas station and the the pre action thought of turning into the lot will strike me for no reason other than for years I'd drive by gas stations and stop to buy beer. No desire to actually drink just subconsciously, "Hey look. That thing with the stuff you need. Better stop." but without words just a quick feeling that I should stop.
I went to a bar which I'm not supposed to do. But it's an awesome bar
and my girlfriend was in town and I wanted her to see it. No desire to drink. But we were trying to leave, I was trying harder, she was finishing her drink, and I instinctually wanted to just down her drink in one swallow so we could go. Which is rude and a dick way to get us out the door. But that was my impulse to get us to leave. To get my way really.
And we were at a restaurant for my brother's birthday and she didn't finish a gin. So gin has the magical ability to make me vomit immediately in a way rubbing alcohol probably couldn't. But as soon as she turned her back to get up I instinctually thought to finish her drink. Didn't want to. Know even in active addiction that gin is useless to me. Still had the thought for no rational reason other than it's what I done did for years, finish other people's drinks given the opportunity.
Her drinking is a whole other story. It doesn't trigger me but she's a cheap date who can't hold her booze. She'd die if she tried to keep up with me. But don't even want to really go into it. It's a thing. Things can be good and bad depending on context.
The painful growth stage of change. You have to be some special kind of asshole to say there is no way in which you could improve yourself. But it's one things to admit your faults or that you have them. When you are actively trying to confront and change those things it's full of uncomfortable realizations about behavior that you did not even know was a problem.
Also around 90 days into early sobriety, it's pretty common to just randomly want to drink for no particular reason.
I wrote a poem about her. And weewooweewoo published it in his literary mag.
I don't even like poetry. She does weird things to me.
I've been really busy. At least I feel like I have been. I've been driving for Uber for 2-3 weeks and I shouldn't feel this busy working whenever I want.
Monday I went to A Moth StorySlam and went on stage. I told a story that normally takes a half hour forty five minutes. I thought I could condense it to the required five but it was harder than I thought. I think I was docked points because I went like 5 seconds over. Because my score was bullshit. But it was awesome. I saw my girlfriend smile for two hours. It was great. I didn't know what to expect from open mic at the Moth but all the stories except one or two would have worked on the radio.
Thanks. I appreciate that you enjoyed the humor.
I don't feel better now, but I now think I might feel better tomorrow