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I could have spent many more hours modeling this but it was a fun exercise to just go through it, despite everything you brought up (which is all accurate). Hey now, it's basically the adult alcoholic version of a snow-cone. Oh man, why don't we all just start using shredded ice with alcohol infused to make adult snow-cone (yes, this is already a thing and it's just as fantastic as it sounds. Going on your research dollars on booze thing. We had an experiment this past semester where we used a Gas Chromatograph solely for the purpose of measuring the alcohol content in samples of Seagram's 7 and Black Velvet...and to set some calibration curves but that's beside the point.