I can relate. For whatever reason, I have always had friends that are significantly older than me and I've been lucky to have had mentors during various periods of my life. I'm sorry to hear about your best friend-- that must be difficult. Everyone needs someone to confide in, but you're right that it's not always easy to do so. Except for the past few years, I've always had one or two female friends who have been willing to listen. If you have some female friends that you trust and who you think might have good insight, you might try that. For one, it might help get around the awkwardness that a lot of Western guys feel about baring emotions and being vulnerable. With any friend, it might be worth framing the problem in a forthright way, as in, "hey, if you don't mind me getting serious for a minute, I have a problem that I need some help with that I'd really like your perspective on." That way, whoever is listening can shift gears. No one likes it when someone starts getting heavy out of the blue.
Just a note for you: If you surround text with the vertical line ( | ), it will be quoted for you. Additionally, I know this may be odd to say, but sometimes having someone within the family isn't the best option. Of course when discussing your parents it may be useful, but there's no guarantee the advice you'd get from an older brother would be good or unclouded by bias, in your reception or his deliverance. I have a younger sister only, and we don't talk at all. There's no substance to our relationship other than we were both raised in the same hell, and really only in theory. We both experienced and processed the abuse we received very differently. I cam through it mostly for the better, but I fear she did not. She's not a very good person now, or good at being a person. Anything either of us said to each other would be meaningless; advice wouldn't be heeded and any discussion of what things we have in common are so radically different that it wouldn't cause anything but friction. What I'm saying is if you want to have an older brother, you should definitely have it someone you choose, insofar as 'older brother' equates to 'trusted confidante'. That's something everyone should have. You should definitely find friends that fall into that category, and if that's not possible, at least some counselor (though I never trusted professionals, more as a holdover of not trusting adults when I was young.) Besides, the old phrase (oft debated if actually new) rings true:The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.