On icanhazchat (big chatrooms with video) we had rules to ensure it was a nice community and no insults, hate, homophobia, etc. Those rules were pretty widely followed without issue except for a couple trolls. For a while they weren't even explicitly stated, it was just assumed that you would be nice.

But after a bit we had to start actively enforcing a "no comparisons" rule throughout the rooms. It was one of those things that was so hurtful to the community, even though there was no insulting or hateful stuff being said. It was the one thing that would get girls to hate each other, get guys to hate each other, make people generally feel like shit, and foster a community where everyone was competing rather than everyone just hanging out and having a good time.

People wouldn't even realize that what they were saying was hurtful or demeaning. So many people just flat out didn't get it. "I'm complimenting him though, so now I can't compliment him???" Yes but you're simultaneously insulting someone else.

Comparisons do a lot of damage to both genders. While I think it is healthy to compare yourself to people around you in order to motivate yourself to do better and be better, you should be doing it for you, not for the approval of people around you. I do this in terms of work, goals, personality, etc. I often wonder how thenewgreen consistently makes everyone around him feel special and am trying to work on that because everyone, including me, likes to feel special.

I try to not compare myself to people based on looks but I fail pretty consistently at that. Comparisons and wanting what other people have is a problem since the beginning of time. I don't think it's specifically a problem in modern society, but it has become much more widespread with the deluge of media and advertisements we are hit with every day. All we can do is notice when we are comparing ourselves to others and be aware that our feelings of jealously or envy and self-esteem are affected by that. Just taking time to actively note this helps make you stronger and more aware, which can help curb those feelings, even if its just a little bit.