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comment by coffeesp00ns

I mean, I literally just told you that I personally know people who are signal boosting these stories, who are involved in activism, who are the kind of people who tell all their friends before major holidays to save the fireworks so the veterans in the area don't have to find a dark, quiet place to hide.

The people in my community who are advocating for physical doctors to listen to women when they're in pain are the same people who are advocating for mental health doctors and psychologists to listen to men when they're in pain. The rate of suicide in men is absolutely gobsmacking. So is the rate of suicide for children under the age of 13.

What drove me to comment as I did is that so often, these stories come with an unspoken (or sometimes explicitly spoken) tag line of "and where are the feminists who say they're for equality?" When it happens, it always comes off to me like the News commentators who ask about black-on-black violence after a white cop kills a black kid.

And in some cases, it's well warranted because there are some shit people who claim feminism. Germaine Greer, for example, is a shit feminist. But again, I need to reinforce that the only people I see talking about these stories are intersectional feminists and queer people. These are the people I see helping people with mental health issues, helping veterans and sexual assault survivors with PTSD. And they're the people who I see get made fun of for creating "safe spaces" where people can talk about their shit, where they know and accept that the concepts like "manning up" are a result of toxic masculinity, a type of masculinity that says men are not allowed to show any emotion other than derision and rage.

And these are also the voices that mainstream culture and mainstream politics are doing their best to squeeze out.




francopoli  ·  69 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    What drove me to comment as I did is that so often, these stories come with an unspoken (or sometimes explicitly spoken) tag line of "and where are the feminists who say they're for equality?" When it happens, it always comes off to me like the News commentators who ask about black-on-black violence after a white cop kills a black kid.

Then I did not comprehend a meaning correctly. That's on me.

    But again, I need to reinforce that the only people I see talking about these stories are intersectional feminists and queer people.

Then you must be looking in online spaces. Guys don't talk about shit like this in public forums because anyone running a background check on your for a job, security clearance, etc that finds posts about you talking about self harm and suicide? You don't get the job. Even these posts, if found by a company running a background check, could be career death for me. There are things I'd love to talk about but do not dare say here because Hubski is google indexed and will show up in spot #1 on any search of my name.

But back to the topic you bring up. Men don't talk about this shit in public because nobody gives a shit if men kill themselves, so why bother. And if they do, a major spotlight ends up right in their face and nobody wants that.

coffeesp00ns  ·  69 days ago  ·  link  ·  

These people (myself included) are advocating for better mental health access for men online and in real life. I've got a brother who came home from the military with a lot of mental health issues, and I do my best to be an ally and advocate for him in particular. It makes me sad that you don't believe me, but I'm not going to push this any further.

francopoli  ·  68 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    It makes me sad that you don't believe me, but I'm not going to push this any further.

Never said I don't believe you. You and I appear to be having two separate conversations. It happens in text based communications. Hope the bother is doing well.