Amazing read. I wonder how different it would have worked out if he had played in college, taken a full load of classes and then worked his way up to the majors. I think that the years between 18 and 23 are a huge time for growth for everyone. It doesn't matter if you play sports or don't, go to college or don't. You change and you first start to figure out who you are as an individual.

It sounds like he needs a lot more intellectual stimulation that he missed out on by going straight to the big leagues. His retirement and new adventure at university is trying to fill this hole. I understand where he is coming from. There are still days I regret dropping out of school. I miss being surrounded by that young, naive unadulterated passion - people who are all looking to learn something new and get better every day. Whether it's through a class itself or new social situations or getting laid or drunk or being hungover.

He needed that but didn't get that from baseball because he is surrounded by people, all a various points of life, all determined to play ball and get to the next level. That is not the ideal environment for discovering who you are and what your values are. No one's values are 100% baseball (or 100% anything) but when you are working so hard are accomplishing one thing, your have to commit your full focus to it.

It makes complete sense that it wasn't satisfying for him because he needed more than baseball in order to find his place in the world - a place where he is happy as a person, knows who he is and is able to love the things he loves. Perhaps if he had a chance to live and learn that before diving headfirst into this 100% focus on baseball, he would have been able to love it and love himself and his life and his place.