My Dad doesn't need or want many other people in his life. He mostly just quietly goes through his public life, lives in his home and his mind.

I defied my mother, even if I meant that I was ruining my life and happiness. I moved out the house around age 19 and only landed back at home twice once for a month and the other time for a handful of months. My parents were pretty cool with me being gone, it wasn't a happy house with me living under their roof, defying their rules.

While waiting table I tried to figure out what people wanted from me. does that person need something, is it napkins, another drink? Bring them napkins without having them ask, go up to the table and ask the person if they are ready for another drink than ask the rest of the table if they need anything. Do they want a silent hand? Do they want to chat? What section of the news paper do they have on top? Sport, cool I could give a fuck but I read it before my shift so I could carry a decent conversation about it. So they like some sass, hell I'll make fun of you if that's what your looking for. What part of who I'm pretending to be is working for what types of people, work on my one liners, work on my chatter, be fucking natural about it. Can I talk these guys into a round of shots? Would the guy who looks like he's going to pick up the check be happier if he gets to be the big man getting everyone sloshed and spreading his money around? Learn to never show that a mean or rude person is getting under my skin, never take a bad to tip the next table, my bad attitude will kill that table as well. Get to the point that I'm not worried about showing it because it doesn't bother me anymore. Try to focus love at each table, watch them respond better, they are loved and it feels good, they give me their money. Think about how boring the whole act has gotten start working at bars where I can tell assholes to fuck off, enjoy myself more and make better money than I did before.

Punk rock is anti-authoritarian, anti-consumer society, anti-propaganda, bohemian. It helped me understand that many of the constraints with which society tries to enslave us and the approbation of our peers for not towing the line are mostly self imposed prisons that we can choose to be fettered by or not.

Sorry for not responding more quickly, i didn't notice your response in my in box or I would have.