As I was writing the #russiabynatives post about parenting in Russia, I got myself thinking about self-image - in particular, what kind of self-image children in Russia form.
When I first went to school, I had barely any self-image, but even then I knew that I should work my ass off to please people around me, or my work is useless. If I fail at something, it's my fault, I should be ashamed of my effort and of the decisions and thoughts that led to this point, no matter how close to succeeding I was.
Then I got to see other people, and pieces started to fall apart. I don't remember exactly what started the process, but I was starting to slowly realize that... maybe other people don't blame themselves for failures - or, not as much as I do. Maybe, even though they know they may be at fault, people don't take it to heart and let those mistakes define them or shame them into changing or working harder. Maybe other people actually have a certain base of personality that they rely on that tells them they may not be perfect, but they certainly aren't the worst if they made Mommy sad.
The lack of self-image early on is something that still echoes in my life, so clearly, it is important that children form an idea of themselves the earlier to better.
What kind of self-image did you have growing up? What parental actions made that self-image for you? Was there something specific, or was it a constant presence of something?