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Poly: Read "The Ethical Slut" right away, please. Despite the unfortunate title, this is an excellent primer into the complex landscape of poly relationships. Just dropping into a relationship with a poly person, without any of the linguistic or conceptual tools to navigate those conversations, is a recipe for hurt. I have a very large number of poly friends who represent every different possible poly configuration, and every one of them recommends this book as the place to start. Good luck with it! It sounds like she has your kind of fuel for your engine. Hopefully you provide the right fuel for her engine, as well.