The context does help I admit, as I was pondering some pretty bad background scenarios that would lead to a breakup based on a musing statement. And as for said mate with the 'staying quiet' breakup, I have a feeling there were bigger issues afoot and an escape was wanted, and it was just an opportunity to get out.

As long as it worked out for the best for you, that's all that matters. I had a horrible event that was practically the grand-slam of nails-in-the-coffin. Happened on an overseas trip last year, and while I'm not very keen on resurrecting exactly what was said and done, all I will say is I should've a) left her in the hotel room, continued the trip on my own accord and rebooked an alternate flight home, and b) probably not spent 4-5 months working out whether to end it.

But, with the 20/20 of hindsight, I realise now that when the inevitable came, it wasn't pretty, but that 4-5 months was spent as a logical, rational pre-mortem analysis of the 4+ years we'd been together, and when she did the dramatic walk-out-the-door routine, I didn't come running after her. Instead, I went and caught up with a mate for lunch, made plans for travels, life, work and new projects, and haven't looked back since.