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comment by kantos
kantos  ·  173 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: February 27, 2019

Aight 'skians, here are some boompoints - since bullet points won't sound like my voice in your head (or your voice in your head - you do you).

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BOOM Over all illnesses and subsequent irritable-ness... es... These two popped in time when the weather warmed up.

BOOM Friendship with a gal in the States fizzled out coincidentally when she began hanging out with her now boyfriend

BOOM Working in a loving family business with a routine work schedule of varying tasks where I can see progress (adds to sense of purpose).

bonus boom Every time I'm off the mountain and in the valley, people I bump into talk about how they worked with/sing praises of/buy from the family (ditto re: purpose).

BOOM I'm on the other side of the Earth with as much or as little distractions from home - including job/academia hunting.

All 4 boons been sloughing off some weighted personality blankets I've been cuddling under for years. Having less and less pulls back to the States (health, girl) plus leveling out my norms here (routine, weather) finally washed away some grime in mah persona-pores.

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Take aways:

WOW I dig how much I've been putting into relationships - even in the falling face first ones. I don't dig how much I bend my line of mind to others interests in hopes of something working out. Learning about gal back home (AKA lesson #3) taught me I let on I give lotta shits about other people to mask how little shits I give on the whole.

WOW I miss my voice. The one that uses vocal chords. I got opinions, needs, and damn fine taste in interests. Silence and waiting is a sweet tactic, but leveraging their use against acting on my wants (via giving it sound) with confidence make 'em more potent.

WOW I have options even when I get back home. Job search is only one. The amount of options for heavily subsidized trips back here are boundless... but the option to get a dual citizenship altogether affords hella in the long run (especially mid-run it turns out).

WOW I feel great for a 20-something. I'm my own best critic, and yet - giving credit where its due - my internal compass has not led me wrong. I have more wind in my sails than I expected; plus, a good crew at my back.

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Non-Sequitur Summary (get pranked, this was a sub-titles rip the whole time)

Brooklyn Nine-Nine is on Netflix.

Balancing reading, journaling, and drawing is lovely.

I have fingernails now that I don't have papers to write!