12 days ago? How the hell did I miss that?
I have never listened to a 32 minute audio on the net and had no intention of listening to all that but appreciated every single second. Really well done. Great use of humor as well as an "interesting" story. I hope that you found saying all of that out loud to be really cathartic. It helped me just hearing it.
Hate to say it but I do not think there is better way to say: There but for the grace of God go I. "Alcohol has saved my life" is not something I have ever heard before but makes perfect sense. "Why would I do that?" I can relate. I can relate to a lot of your history. I enjoy one martini before dinner, a deep red with a steak or an ice cold beer out of a cooler in the summer but other than that I see no reason to drink other than to get drunk.
Just like I never took acid for the taste. I actually did have a picture of me tripping in the yearbook.
I fucking knew what girl that story was going to came back to! You are so right that if you are doing it with her as a reason that is enough for now but you know that is not enough for the long term. I was happy to hear you realize that. Nothing sticks unless you are doing it for yourself.