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comment by user-inactivated
user-inactivated  ·  446 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: January 4, 2023

Ah shit. My main concern was the effect on my dad too. Mum is the glue of the family, and I doubt he'd handle her departure.

I know this is a useless platitude from a stranger, but I'm sorry to hear this is happening to you and yours.





tacocat  ·  444 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Brother and I are up shit creek more than we already are if he files for divorce. Mostly my brother because I'm already fucked to hell

kleinbl00  ·  444 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Medicare has a 7-year lookback on divorces and medical expenses. My aunt, upon realizing this, informed her 10-years-older husband that they should get divorced, not because she didn't love him, but as a tenured professor who was putting a lap pool in their basement she just didn't see any ability to maintain her lifestyle and his health. He'd committed suicide within eighteen months and for the past three years she's been loudly professing her uninvolvement in his decision like Lady Macbeth and the blood.

I recognize this isn't good news - it's "you're exactly as fucked as you think you are, no more, no worse" news.

On the other hand, you and yours should be aware of Medicaid estate recovery, which has a nasty habit of surprising people who have better things to worry about, like sick and dying relatives. Estate recovery rules vary by state. Louisiana is predatory but it's one of the few cases where poverty is to your advantage.

tacocat  ·  442 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I'm way more fucked than I'm letting on. My mom is laying in bed and accusing my stepdad of cheating because I guess she has nothing better to do. There's no insurance finagling in her head. I guess some old ass dude is hitting on her too and she's not real happy about that. Fucking train wreck and me and my brother usually end up talking about Elon Musk being a moron somehow thankfully

kleinbl00  ·  442 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    Fucking train wreck and me and my brother usually end up talking about Elon Musk being a moron somehow thankfully

🎶♫♬♩♪♫🎸🎸And I say Whatabout BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY'S🎶♫♬♩♪♫🎸🎸

I guess my broader point is that "I am generally fucked" is a mentality that fogs you from considering "how am I specifically fucked" and "how am I specifically fucked" is a useful question to ask in this instance if for no other reason than you can address and mitigate specifics, while generalizations just serve to drive you deeper.

Most aid organizations help specifically. Very few help generally.

tacocat  ·  442 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I'm going to jail, dude, and I'm almost happy because they feed you. I'm pretty fucked