Yeah I don't know how helpful this is, but with my team and teams over the last few years my strategy has been to be transparent and say "here are my days off where, if something urgent happens, you can reach me by PHONE ONLY" and tell them if I don't communicate that for a given day off, that they will not be able to reach me under any circumstances.I now understand her point about setting expectations. If I answer things while on leave that tells people I'll continue to do so in the future. I never considered that and just did it wanting to keep on top of things but..Here we are with my out of office message more of a suggestion than a hard and fast rule.
It's good advice! I do have a work phone and they're very good at only calling it if they need me urgently. I just worry. It's a me thing and I think I'm improving, but I'm sure it's partially down to the fact that I got promoted from being a member to being their manager, so I know quite intimately how much shit they have do deal with and I want to protect them from it. In time I've eased up, I hope! The academic whining is to be expected and thankfully my boss stepped in so I've not replied to much this week.