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comment by ThatFanficGuy

I agree with all of what you say. I've been experiencing it too - and shying away from certain things in a similar manner for similar reasons.

I'd started to find the default to the combative stance in discourse too distasteful to take part in. I realized that a lot of my misery came from the mindset of being at war with the world: with the people, with the ideas I encounter, with myself... Letting go of trying to win is liberating because it allows you to shed the responsibility of having to acquire the prize - something that doesn't exist but in your head.

I enjoy games, I enjoy friendly competition. I don't enjoy finding myself in a cesspool, to borrow the common term, where people would rather belittle each other than compete honestly. I know how intoxicating it is, and I'm already prone to becoming addicted to easy ways out. It's terribly satisfying to feel big in the moment, for a moment. If you string enough moments together, it may even seem like a good enough deal not to pay attention to your misfortune.

I used to play a lot of Dota 2. Used to enjoy the shit-talking. At one point, I quit Dota for a year because I felt like the social atmosphere there wasn't conducive to good play or to well-being. I came back because I enjoyed the game too much.

I used to get a kick out of listening to people claiming they'd slept with my mother because I made me get a kick out of feeling superior to them. "I'm not like that! I'm better than this!".

It's the same thing.

I think it was getting into CS:GO that catalized the range of experiences on the matter and led me to implement the zero-tolerance mute policy. If someone makes a comment aimed to destabilize (by either blaming or inciting anger), I mute them. If they start the match by shouting the sound bites from the latest compendium, I mute them (they had nothing of value to say to begin with, I conclude). After muting most people I play with, both in CS:GO and in Dota, I started to find the matches far more enjoyable. Things go smoother, quieter and somewhat more coordinated.

There was that thing that GoldVision, the guy that played GTA V in the most pacifist way possible, said on Twitter:

    <...> every comment, message or mention, good OR bad, makes its target more powerful. For your own happiness and sanity, please only amplify ideas you want to see more of

So I understand why you wouldn't share the article, and I respect your choice.

Anger is powerful. It's easy to give in to it. It can become a powerful tool, but only when used with a cold mind. Otherwise, combustion is imminent and the heat is likely to damage all that surround it.