So, my lady friend got back together with an ex. Before I knew, I came around to express my feelings to her in attempts to move forward romantically. Clearly, they weren't as mutual as I led myself to believe. So, I set a shitty boundary for myself of "I don't want to be providing emotional support for her, when that's what she's seeking from her boyfriend. So, I will exit this relationship save from spaces we both already coexist in."
Which, in and of itself isn't too shitty, imo. The part that bothered me is how this was more an excuse to effectively cut her out of my life despite enjoying the time we spend together. That is something I'd like to do to fully avoid the issue, but what this boils down to is:
1) Do I want to give myself both the space and time to grieve the reality of the situation before moving forward with our friendship.
2) Do I want to give myself just time to grieve the reality of the situation while moving forward with our friendship.
And what that would mean is getting a bit clearer with how I'm willing to show up with her (e.g. reciprocative processing shit around families, working out, finding past times in the city) and not (e.g. not willing to be her go to if/when there are troubles in her current relationship, not third wheeling, etc.)
Tl;dr realizing I can choose to enjoy the friendship I have with her. Plus, I don't want to let the fact that I didn't get what I want to get in the way of having a dank friend - is what I'm sorta coming to terms with.