This is an interesting question to me because I stand almost on the opposite side; today I have been mentally bemoaning the fact that there is no person I work with whom I can really be 100% truly honest with my opinions about other coworkers with (because, such talk is gossip; and there isn't a single coworker I both trust to keep my words private/to themselves, and from whom I think I'd get a sympathetic ear). I have an anti-gossip reputation because of some crap that went down a year or so ago at work. I think that is a better reputation to have. Someone came to me and divulged gossip which I felt was way over the line and was about a coworker whom i'm quite fond of. My solution at that time was to go to that coworker and let her know. That set the ball in motion. if I were you, first, I'd refrain. It's very hard to refrain from all gossip and honestly, as a human, I think it's unreasonable to think that we would stop talking about the other humans around us...so a better and more realistic step 1(a) - I would recommend, stop using names. Just stop. You can imply or let others pick up on who you are talking about, but stop naming people specifically. The furthest I feel comfortable going is often, "A certain manager..." or "a certain coworker." Even if it is probably COMPLETELY obvious to my immediate coworkers who I am talking about (assuming they know who I work with on what, which they should) -- I feel that 'discretion' not only gives you a cushion to fall back on if gossip comes back to bite you in the ass...but also prevents the gossip from becoming too personal or starting a bitch circle about a single person or manager. It prevents the gossip from going too far (in a single moment/conversation). It also gives the rest of your people you're talking with the opportunity to pretend they don't know who you're talking about if they don't want to engage. Or if they think what you're saying is something they are better off not knowing. (These factors are more relevant in a more discrete workplace, as mine is and it sounds like yours is not.) The first step with this problem really has to start with you. If someone tells you gossip which you think is over the line or harmful or untrue, you could try asking, "Should you be telling me that?" When it comes to gossip about changes in company direction and/or expectations...I think that's a little more normal and you can't expect to stamp that out. When there is uncertainty with the company, there will always be more. If you are a person whom others look to for advice, or confidence, and you hear gossip about the state of the company that you think is overly negative or needlessly worrisome, stand up straight, say "i'm sure it's not as bad as we think it is," and turn back to your desk and work. Be a good example.
Yeah. I've been trying the whole "Just shut the fuck up and work" route, but it's so hard to stick to. People are angry and frustrated and wanna complain, and I'm angry and frustrated and wanna complain, and we're all frustrated by similar stuff, so it just comes so easily. It's like if their was a flood in your city and it's affecting everyone, how can you not talk about the flood, but at the same time, every time someone brings up the flood, it just rains a bit more. I think though, I might start with the whole idea redirection and only willing to talk about someone if it's positive.
Or even - if it's negative, but it's something that it helps others to know - I think that is fine too. There is helping other people out and giving them a heads' up (he's in a bad mood today, or she's very picky about proofreading, or whatever). I also think it can be good just to vent...but I try to keep my venting either short, or directed at people I don't work immediately with. If there is so much negative talk going on at your work that it makes you feel bad afterwards - that it bothers you enough to want to ask, hey, like, do we have to keep doing this? should we? can we cut this out?, except to a bunch of people and phrased more like "what are your thoughts?"... it's not just regular gossip lol. I love gossip, but not when it makes you feel grimy.
Another good rule, of critique or criticism as a whole in general forever and ever amen: if you are going to say something negative, start with a positive. Make that a rule. You have to say something positive about a person before you can dive into what about them is driving you crazy today. It is a small place to start but I think practicing this can help change your overall mentality
Sounds like the good ol' compliment sandwich. Simple and effective. I try to implement it when tutoring. It provides that nice balance of feedback. And, actively thinking to make that balance can help me remember either good or bad statement for continuity in future progress or setbacks - adds a nice extra touch of care.