I did think you weren't entirely serious in your first comment but also that it was coming from a place of honesty.

I do appreciate being stoic but I think it has its time and place. The men who've influenced my life are, variously, stoic, tough guy, hard ass, bad ass, empathetic, sensitive and intelligent. I feel like kind of an odd duck but in a good way. I can sometimes try to be a sarcastic hard ass but I can also be sincere and emotional if I need to be.

I also have never had close male friends. Guys still more often than not rub me the wrong way with the constant rib poking about whatever may not be suitably masculine about them. I'm pretty witty though and now that I'm around a lot of men that do this I will sometimes throw them some smart ass comments about gender expectations or the treatment of women.

Over the last year and a half or whatever it's been that I've been in some kind of treatment, I've decided that my closely held beliefs are worth vocally defending, even if they're unpopular. So I can be sort of a jerk if someone says something stupid in group therapy and turn around and give a sincerely empathetic response based on my own experience to someone who seems to be earnestly reaching out and not rambling on about some canned bullshit in order to sound good.

I think men are fortunate in that we can fill a dichotomous role at this point, depending on who we're with, where we can be like the old kind of man's man but also sensitive. Woman who might seem stoic would be called frigid bitches and that's unfortunate because that kind of behavior can have it's place, in some work roles and environments for example.

Just fuck all expectations. Everyone is just a person and we'll all be healthier people if we're not expected to act or look a certain way.