In the past year (perhaps even precisely; perhaps even a year to this day) I:
- unexpectedly broke up with my S/O (that's our kick-off event) (PS I checked. Exactly a year ago, tomorrow)
- moved out of their house (STAT)
- moved in with my parents for 5 months (thank you, mom and dad)
- found a wonderful little apartment in a great location where i now live with my sister
- lost 20 lbs (but gained around 7 back...hey, holidays! And life's a journey, right? Those 7 pounds are just giving me a new goal)
- didn't really date - like, kind of dated one or two people, but mostly consciously was trying to take the year off of it, after the Catastrophic Break-up
- took a lot of time to myself because I felt the need to recalibrate, ask myself what i really want, and reorient - realign my life to help me reach those goals more effectively
- revamped my whole financial management system (i have a bank account for each bill now, essentially - I recommend this btw)
- read like a million stephen king books
- kicked total ass at work (at least as much ass as i consistently could i guess)
- also i got 3 tattoos
- found balance and stability in/with my life and my self.
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It's been a good year. I'm glad the break-up happened. I'm glad I saw it as an opportunity to prove to myself my worth and capability, and I think I did.
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Who's on the East Coast? Meriadoc arguewithatree blackbootz
I think it would be fun if we could arrange another little meet-up, I know there are new hubskiers and I promise that I, like kleinbl00, am much more tolerable in person, so if anyone else is nearish to the DC/Baldymore area, give us a shout
- much more tolerable in person
I can vouch for the fact that this person is SO UN-FREAKING-BELIEVABLY fun to hang out with... it makes me occasionally check airfare to the area JUST SO I COULD HANG OUT.
I'm not even joking. An evening with ref is an evening of fun. full stop.
Love this - win that breakup. It's a rare life allowance to reflect - with the partner gone, there's all this free time to think. Four of my friends broke up with long-term partners recently. All except one is taking it as a chance to reorient. The last one is still trying to get him back...that's a bad place to be usually.
I'm in Boston. It's a bit far, but I could maybe make a meetup in DC.
Savings, actually. My bank allows you to have as many savings accounts as you want and you can open 'em all online. So I have like 7 savings accounts tied to my current checking, that all have the bill $ auto-deposited. About half are auto-debited as well.
I'm about to transition my active checking account - I noticed with all the linked savings it's really easy to shuffle the money and play "funny money" if I'm short - so I'm severing that link and just opened a new fee-free checking at another bank. Once I fund it with DD and get the card, I'm going to cut up/hide my old debit card to make the bill funds more difficult to access.
Credit score absolutely no, IRS probably not, honestly totally happy to finance nerd out with you in PMs/DMs/text.
If they were all checkings there would be more potential for credit score impact but honestly that would depend more on the account and tied functionality (like if there was a tied line of credit to the account(s).) there is also a separate system banks use to rate depositors (much like a credit score but for - well, deposits instead) however maintaining multiple accounts shouldn’t impact that negatively.
A great many words about my dog, Cooper
I found out a few days ago exactly what breed my dog is. His prior owners thought Doberman/terrier, we thought Australian terrier. Someone who knows better told me that he is, in fact, a Jagdterrier. Created between WWI and WWII by a German eugenecist/biologist interested in a new breed to compete with English hunting terriers, they rose to prominence in the lead-up to WWII, and their popularity was greatly bolstered by growing nationalism and their perception as a truly "German" breed.
They are real good at killing, and at tracking blood. Nearly as good as bloodhounds at the latter. Mine is mostly good at hiding under blankets when it gets too cold, and climbing the back of the sofa to lay his head against my neck. He can track mud perfectly, not sure about a scent.
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Things haven't been great.
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We took him to the Humane Society on saturday - by "we", I mean myself and my pseudo-mother-in-law. She's the only one I know in Portland right now with a car. He was not too happy about it.
I was hoping they might be able to take him in - I'd been talking with them on the phone for a week or so about what the best course of action is with him, and if they would be able to find him a home. They told me to come in for a Behavioral Assessment, which consists of the following: testing interactions with humans in a variety of situations; testing interactions with dogs in a variety of situations; complete physical; assessing level of training/trainability.
He did real well with the humans, physical, and training. I never had any doubts that he would - always been a people puppy, quite a bit on the overloving side if I'm being honest.
They brought a dog in (their calmest, I was told). Cooper barked the dog into a corner, at which point they replaced the real dog with a toy dog that looked like him. Cooper broke out of his harness, and within seconds had bitten the head off of this toy dog.
So I've been told, at least - I was in the waiting room, talking with Jen about what it is to be young and fairly apolitical in Portland.
They brought Cooper back to me, and I was told by the head trainer that they didn't feel safe housing him. She said that she didn't know of any rescues that would take him, but she would send out some emails anyway. She said my best option was to find friends or family nearby to take him, both of which are in fairly short supply for me in these parts. Other than that, she said my best bet was finding an individual owner, and... trailed off.
I broke down a bit. I just kind of sat in the lobby, crying a bit and hugging Cooper until another dog came, and I felt like I should go.
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He ate a whole lot of treats that night - the very best that the local-ish Walgreens carried. There was some song playing above me about how "I would do anything for my baby"; I got him a squeaky toy too, and booked it before the soundtrack had a chance to get even more on the nose.
The heating is shit in this house, and because my beau is out east for a funeral, Coop's my heating pad at the moment. I watched 8 hours of stand up specials, and knit a cowl (pictured below). We fell asleep on the couch.
Same thing the next day, sans cowl.
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Cut to Monday. I get a text from a man an hour or so north of me, followed by half a dozen pictures of: A. terriers and B. Nutria (of the dead persuasion). He's spent the last 17 years rescuing terriers (and other hunting/working dogs), training them, and finding homes for them on farms / rural areas. He was contacted by the trainer at the Humane Society, who has evidently been working like crazy to find a home to take Coop. This is the man who told me what kind of dog Cooper is, and that he would be willing to take him in if I want him to.
We talked on the phone for a while - I made Cooper sit in the other room because I'm a crazy person and haven't had much sleep.
I'm giving Cooper to him this coming Tuesday. He'll be living in a house with 2 other dogs, and he'll go out hunting every weekend. This guy lives on a couple acre property where Cooper can just run free and eat mice and shit all day if he wants to. He'll probably stay there a few months till he's been trained to behave with other dogs, and then he'll go to a suitable home where he can do some sort of work.
It's perfect for him, and I'm sad. This dog has brought me a whole lot of joy, and I've learned a lot from him. But he shouldn't be 36 pounds, and sleeping on a couch all day. He shouldn't be inside 95% of the day because I'm afraid of another dog attacking him (or, more probably, of him attacking another dog). he shouldn't have to hear little critters on the other side of the wall all day unless there's a chance he can chase them down. I've been looking for a home like this for him since about a month after we got him, and it looks like he'll finally be somewhere he can do what he was made to do.
I can't stop thinking about blood. About how the fuck a type of dog bred for hunting by Nazis ended up in Oregon, and how now I've been feeding him CBD biscuits twice a day so he doesn't jump over the fence and kill my landlord's chickens. I feel an abiding sadness for dogs who have been bred past the point of being able to fend for themselves, but this is the first time I've cared for a dog who is probably much better equipped to live alone than I am.
May he find work, and a lasting home. Hell, may we all.
Pictures:
EDIT: I was teaching the kids how to say "I love you" in spanish, and then "I love you forever". A kid asked what forever means, I told them. They asked "where does the love go when you die?" and I couldn't think of an answer. The best I could come up with is "you take it with you", but then they asked "where?". I told them to ask their parents.
Thank you. We've been doing our best to give him a good, active life in the circumstances, but I eventually just came to accept that that's a crazy uphill battle. I'm happy to have given him a comfortable, if boring 5 months - but I'm much happier about finding him a means to a happy rest of his life.
What an adorabe bubpe. Half way through your post I texted my brother (who lives in Portland) offering him your dog. I am glad to finish your post and see you have found a happy forever home for Cooper.
It is hard. Pets are wonderful. But it sounds like you are making the right decision, painful though I am very sure it is/will be.
I'm contemplating paying off my mortgage.
I have a friend whose insurance wants to let his kidney fail (again) because when he's in full-throated renal failure they only have to pick up 20% of the tab (medicare eats the rest), rather than paying for the immunoglobulin he's on to try and stave off failure. So he tried to get his hospital to give him printouts of how much it cost the insurance company (hundreds of thousands) and him (tens of thousands) the last time he went through renal failure. They won't give him anything because he's $2100 in arrears on bills. He's $2100 in arrears on bills because he lost his job. He lost his job because his kidneys are failing.
I've already given him a thousand dollars. His parents have $250k/year in pensions and a million and a half in laddered CDs. But he's my problem because they think he's "irresponsible" because he eats cheeseburgers.
I feel guilty contemplating paying off my mortgage.
this is why lottery winners go crazy.
I paid off my mortgage and told no one. I recommend it.
I'm in "doing the math" mode. I pay roughly 3% interest on the note. I pay $50 or so in interest each month, the rest is paying off the principle. My money market/stock/non-savings cash and holdings made 16% last year. As I won't be able to deduct mortgage interest anymore due to the tax bill, I'm debating be done with it. Then again I may just use the money and fix all the little crap jobs so if I want I can sell the house quick.
$6350 single filing for the 2017 year. With the charity deductions, work stuff, state and local taxes, sales taxes etc I am way over that. I've itemized every year the past decade.
Next year, 2018 tax year, standard deduction is going to be $12K and I may barely touch that depending on medical expenses.
Apparently, the GOP actually expanded medical tax deductions for the next two years, which is a huge departure from their original position that they were going to kill that deduction altogether, so you might get an extra boost. In the new law, any expense greater than 7.5% of your adjusted gross income is now deductible, instead of 10% in the previous law. This returns to 10% after two years.
My new year begins. DTW headed for SF. This week thenewgreen and I host our third “Longevity Soirée” which has become quite the affair. A few hubskiers will be in the house, so I’ll make a point to snap a pic.
I saw my grandmother for what is likely the last time last night. She said ‘thank you’ after I said goodbye and told her I loved her, but it’s difficult to say if she understood. I get along with a number of family members that don’t, so I’m sort of the de facto go-between on sensitive issues. It’s not easy, but I love them all, insane as they can be.
Falling apart is complicated.
I got a girlfriend recently. She's mad cute. That's mainly what's on my mind. The whole sunshine on a cloudy day.
Tonight I'm seeing my high school classmate kick off his campaign for state senate for Maryland's 41st district. Tomorrow night I'm seeing Sam Harris in DC with David Frum and Andrew Sullivan, likely to tear Trump a new asshole. And then Saturday I'm off to Palm Desert (78° F) to see my dad for a week, where we're gonna hike San Jacinto mountain.
Then school. I'm so fucking excited for school. Constitutional law, macroeconomics, statistics, club gymnastics and soccer. I also joined a speaker series organization last semester and we were able to secure a date for Bryan Caplan to come this February. Life is one big nerdy oyster right now.
I'll write up my thoughts. I was going to see about meeting wasoxygen before the event, like the last time I was in DC for a lecture/talk, but I'll be with my mom and, even though she's a cool lady, I'm not sure wasO wants to meet her. (Miss Nancy: ... so, you two met on the... Internet?)
The event seems like it could turn into an anti-Trump bonanza. David Frum and Andrew Sullivan are some of the sharpest, most vocal anti-Trumpers I know. But I seem to recall Sam saying he might try to diversify the evening's subject material. Who knows.
Any questions you think I should ask?
That's a hard one. I would love to talk to Harris at length, but I don't know what I would ask him given just one question. Maybe something to the effect of
'How are you able to continue to engage with people who disagree with you so viciously, and still retain peace of mind and a gentle demeanor?'
It's one thing to hear him talk abstractly about meditation, or share a story or two about some past experience, but I'm most interested in learning how to safely, or more safely gaze into the abyss.
That's a good one and I agree. I get exasperated and uneasy at even slight misunderstandings of what I say. Wholesale and repeated fabrication and willful misrepresentation... that's gotta be discouraging.
I would also ask a methods-based question. Something like how does he practice his delivery? Is it the podcasts, talks, and public conversations themselves that represent his practice? He's incredibly articulate and yet doesn't sacrifice the range or quality of argument. Does he stand on the beach and practice with pebbles in his mouth? #Demosthenes
I'll drink some of the bourbon I brought home from KY.
Music
I commissioned a pixel artist to do some art for my music project and I got this cool scene out of it:
I also won an auction on a cheap and cheesy Yamaha PC-100 which should be arriving in the near future.
Other stuff
I put up an easel in my living room and I've been idly painting watercolors. It's fun, and maybe I'll eventually have some decent paintings to show for it.
Time is going so fast now.
Lots and lots of good things.
Some crappy things.
I feel like there is so much I want to share with hubski... but I'm like the bag of cereal that isn't open wide enough... so no matter how hard you shake the box, only a few pieces fall out. All of my sugary nuggets are trapped. Hopefully I can find a way to gracefully open the bag without it ripping.
I love you all and I mean it and you know that I mean it.
This is my second time drawing this image. The first time around, I did it in pencils and it was a lot different. The man looked more like a man and was wearing a shoot, it was on a roof in a city with tall buildings in the background. Blah blah blah. Anyway, I experimented with shadows on the tree, grass on the ground, and the flow of water. I think if I draw this a third time, I'll put feathers on the bird.
Random Statements
Adventure Time is a fun show.
I'm not a fan of stretchy jeans.
I'm looking harder at going back to school.
Hubski is full of wonderful people that I'm fortunate to talk to.
Adventure Time is a wonderful show - one of my favorites. The universe/lore is pretty complicated, chock-full of some iconic characters, and neatly packaged philosophy - e.g. Hall of Egress.
Yeah. Dala and I stopped watching it after we gave up cable. It's on Hulu now though, so I'm going through the whole thing.
There's a lot to it and sometimes I'm surprised at how mature some of the subjects it covers can be (even if it is kidified). I think one of the things I like most about it though, is that it comes up with wild and creative characters and environments for viewers to enjoy but grounds them enough through pseudo-nostalgia and familiar themes so that they can be novel without overwhelming.
Keto Diet
Still in the romance stage with the new diet. Losing weight. Eating well. Feeling sated. Pants are looser. The scale says I'm down 10lbs so far this year. (A pound a day!)
I don't expect it to go on like this for ever, but I am enjoying it very much right now.
Fallout 4
I spend all my spare time playing Fallout 4. I'm at level 31 and just joined the Brotherhood of Steel, but still can't even build a cooking area or armor workbench because I'm not a "Level 2" something or other.
I have no idea how the points/ranking/skills system works. But every time I level-up I get one more Perk point to stick into gun skills or agility, and I soldier on.
I think I'll like Fallout 4 much more when I understand it better.
For now, I just like making sure all my little communities have happy little workers, and enough food, water, and defense, to keep them above a 60 in Happiness. (Whatever that means.)
Forza Horizon 3
Bought my XBox One S with Forza Horizon 3 - the Hot Wheels Edition because I was REALLY jazzed to play a driving game that is based on Hot Wheels... but Forza doesn't work on my XBox for some reason. The graphics rendering is all fucked up. I can hear the game playing in the background, but the screen is just random polygons flashing on and off constantly.
Both Forza and Microsoft support have completely ignored all of my request for help.
Meh. Like I care. I have Fallout.
- (A pound a day!)
That seems pretty freaking dangerous.
- but still can't even build a cooking area or armor workbench because I'm not a "Level 2" something or other.
If I recall correctly, you need to upgrade your settlement by installing basic necessities and then some.
If your PC can handle it, modding the game is an intense but fun experience. So many things to choose from!
The rate of weight loss isn't a problem, at this point. I'm still taking in plenty of calories, and the early losses will not be indicative of losses over time. It'll stabilize to a reasonable pace once the "easy" sources of fuel have been exhausted.
As far as Fallout goes, it's on the XBox One S. Which is flaky enough. I don't want to mod it and make it even more flaky.
So... my settlements have a couple of measures of vitality, including Food, Water, Defense, Beds, etc. I got all that taken care of. So then I saw I could install a "Trader Stand". But I needed to be a Level 2 Community Organizer, or some shit, before I could build it. And Community Organizer is not something I can put my experience points in to, and can't seem to find any way to level up in the game, so... ah fuck it... time to kill another Behemoth.
The community organizer thing should be somewhere in your skill/perk tree, IIRC - it's been a minute since I have messed with FO4, I am currently enjoying a playthrough of New Vegas. I recall there being some sort of prerequisite to get it, but I can't remember what exactly it was - a certain score in a SPECIAL Attribute or another skill or perk or something? Possibly a certain level of barter skill?
I like the idea of settlement building but found the implementation a bit lacking. I have heard that you can now build vaults and I did get the season pass so I can get that but just haven't bothered to load the game up in awhile.
- I like the idea of settlement building but found the implementation a bit lacking.
My specific complaint, building up a settlement doesn't actually DO anything.
I can be as detailed and thorough about my defenses as I like and they will still get overrun if I don't stop by personally every time they are attacked.
'I left you with four fuck-hueg robot guardians, all equipped with rockets and multi-lasers, enough turrets to make the german fortifications at Normandy look like chicken wire and rent-a-cops, and you STILL need my help? You guys don't deserve to live.'
That's awesome news about the diet! After experimenting with keto and seeing what it did for my body composition and energy, I fell in love. I don't currently diet, but on my good days, my shopping and eating habits conform to the low carbohydrate, adequate protein, and gobs of fat recommendations of keto.
Not to imply that you need to do anything more than what you're already doing, but I found that minimal strength training (twice a week, 2 hours total) and sprinting (once a week, <15 minutes) pushed my energy levels and satisfaction with my lifestyle into cloud nine. Granted, I enjoy the low background sore feeling that comes with strength training, so my cloud nine is slightly atypical.
Nonetheless, good on ya.
When you can keep to keto it will reward you handsomely.
How much charcuterie have you been eating? When I was going hard on keto, I would buy a party sized deli tray about once every two weeks and tell myself I was eating healthy as I stuffed myself with capocollo.
I’d bet a hefty sum that you’re sharper on your off days than me when I’m at the top of my game.
Hang in there. Best wishes for next Monday.
We all Wyome from time to time.
I haven't the first clue about anything below the scale of countries anywhere in Europe. Finally going to visit Norway in a few months for a team meeting, never been on your side of the Atlantic :).
That's a Simpsons reference, yah? Even the new stuff that people diss on is still pretty good, from the few episodes I've seen.
I haven't really bonded with my Subaru. I don't like the idea of bonding with a car. It's just a tool. Yet I can't help feeling like it annoys me.
1. The Gracenote musician photos on the stereo.
2. Cruise control dying when adaptive cruise control disables. Ok, fine, you can't tell if there's a car ahead of me. I can. Just hold a steady 60 mph.
3. The volume control buttons on the steering wheel suck.
4. The dealer is everything I hate about car dealers and is everything my Honda dealer wasn't.
5. The driver side windshield washer is pathetic. Above 25 mph it just sprays the bottom of the windshield. Related to #4, the dealer just says "seems fine to us."
6. This is the only car I've ever driven with adaptive cruise control, and maybe it's the best of the best. But I can't help feel like it's stupid. Accelerate toward a car going much slower, then stop accelerating 20 feet away, then coast too close and brake. Even absent the adaptive part, the cruise more generally is stupid. It can't handle hills. Hill starts, and the speed drops. The cruise responds by accelerating, eventually going faster than the set point. Then I crest the hill, the car still had the accelerator down, and now we're going much faster than the set point. It slows the car, maybe even braking, and eventually is slower than the set point. I think it's a PID controller with some shitty gain settings. It needs to put more emphasis on derivative and less on proportional.
7. It thinks there's a passenger with there's a pound of stuff on the passenger seat.
I'd miss the AWD, but I'm thinking about trading for a Civic hatchback. I wish the Clarion was cheaper.
You don't have to bond with your car, but it really helps if you love your car. Know what I'm saying? I'll elaborate...
I average 20k miles on my car in a given year, pretty much any given year for the past 6 or 7. (This last year is actually the first year I've probably averaged substantially less than that.) I'm not attached to my car, perse - yes, it has a name (Ricardo) - but if I crashed it, I wouldn't cry about it, or miss it like an old friend. I'd shrug, and I'd get a replacement vehicle ASAP, and that would suck, and the process would suck...but I wouldn't be emotionally upset that I lost that specific car to "car-death."
On the other hand - I've thought about this in passing over the years, cuz you have to - I'd probably replace it with the exact same make and model, if I were able to. I love my car. I love my leather seats, I love the sunroof, I love how it handles (every time someone else drives and goes, "You have really responsive brakes!" I nod proudly and am like, "Yep!" - cuz why wouldn't you have responsive brakes if you had that choice, hmm?), it's never given me a real mechanical problem or failure, it just - works. It works well in every way that I need it to work. It doesn't feel too big or too small. Some of the controls are a little non-intuitive and I don't necessarily know how to work them without getting in there and mashing on the buttons...but those controls are things like passenger climate control and the built-in GPS system, they are not things I use much at all, nor is their design impactful to me as a driver in any way on the regular.
Get a car you love. Love cars because they work. I guess - you don't have to bond with a vehicle and doing so, could be kind of silly sometimes, even.
But you do have to trust it.
2010 Mazda 3s, Which I got used with about 45k miles on it - but fully loaded with the leather seats, sunroof, 6 disc cd changer, et al. It was actually the first car I test drove and someone almost bought it out under me, but their financing fell thru or smtn.
I will also say I’m fortunate to travel frequently for work but only close enough distances that they’re driveable - I could train or I could drive and I accrued too many really frustrating train experiences (and much prefer the freedom/flexibility driving affords) to really continue the Amtrak route. What I’m getting st by this is I get to drive compact/intermediate rental cars 6x-10x a year and I use it as an opportunity to check out different make/models (basic features across the board but how a car handles matters most to me nonetheless). So I’ve gotten to drive the Ford Focus, basic Kia, basic Nissan, sometimes venturing into even CRV or midsize range depending on what the rental company has available...Basically I’ve been able to test drive a variety of vehicles in about the size & price range that I’ll be looking at down the road, and I’ve definitely tried to consciously note cars I like or cars I don’t. So I’ve gotten some freebie exploring that not everyone can take advantage of.
At the end of the day I prefer the Mazda, absolutely. For a compact 4-door the Nissan, Kia, Ford, just don’t compare. They all feel lighter (pushable by wind) which is a big factor for me (I drive over a couple of windy bridges on route). I tried the Yaris and that just sucked. Once I had a CRV and that was pretty good but that’s more vehicle and gas than I’d need or want IRL. Also it made me feel ridiculous. Generally speaking Nissans aren’t bad (first car was a Nissan) but the Mazda wins out overall. Used to drive a Prius but once I got used to the acceleration of standard cars the Prius became frustrating - Ricardo is v responsive. Just a 4-cylinder. The biggest trouble I have (had) with him is tires, and I’m pretty sure that’s mostly my fault - mine and the potholes’.
Hands down recommend any day.
That is the car I was set on buying, but the telescope would not fit in the rear doors due to the slope of the roof.
You mention the Ford Focus. What did you think? Did you, like I did, wonder how a car could be that FUCKING TERRIBLE and still sell?
I'd say I trust my car to not do something stupid. If it was a person, it wouldn't spend the grocery money on lottery tickets. But if it was a person it would put the toilet paper on backwards and burn dinner because they were watching TV and lots of other little things that would bug me.
I liked my last car, but when it was time to change, I shrugged and moved on, sort of like you said. This one, then, isn't a bad car, but it isn't a great partner.
- 7. It thinks there's a passenger with there's a pound of stuff on the passenger seat.
It is due to the sensor. The seat does not use weight but capacitance. When I put my telescope stuff in the seat? not a problem. my Laptop bag? all the alarms. I've got 40K miles on mine and its a car. I don't love it, I don't hate it. The dealer is great for me, however, and have helped with everything that I have had issues with (mostly small crap here and there, nothing major).
The infotainment system is fucking bad. Just. BAD. The new Subarus have been touting the better information screens and user interface, but they suck as well. No buttons on screen, everything a virtual capacitance touch screen, in a moving vehicle bouncing down the road is poor choices, IMO. Next car I get will have Android Auto and will just use a cell phone as the driver for the system. Right now I use the phone, connect it via bluetooth and use VLC to play music and playlists.
The only other thing I really have to add is that the all wheel drive is still taking some getting used to. The first time that the AWD kicked in while hydroplaning? I coulda made diamonds in my ass as much as I was puckered. With the snow and ice this weekend I will take the car out to a parking lot or field and do donuts and test slamming on the brakes to get more practice with the car in shit conditions.
Thanks, I didn't know the seat sensor was capacitive. I've been driving it for 15 months and the sensor never went off with books, groceries, hat/gloves, water bottles, but then I put my boot traction spikes on it and the alarm is killing me.
I agree the infotainment is awful, but I've driven worse ones as rentals. The Chevy Trax had a touchscreen volume control which was awful. I Bluetooth audio into mine, too, and it drives me crazy that the system doesn't use the phone album or artist art. Other systems do. The system functions fine on a basic level, but it feels like something I'd have expected in 2010, not my 2016 model year.
I've been nothing but happy with the AWD. I've driven it into some pretty snowy hiking trailheads. While I might have done the same with my Civic, it would have been a ton of planning both for the approach into the lot and getting out. With the Impreza, I just drove in and back out. I'm not talking two feet of snow, but 6-9" can be a real concern. No problem in the Impreza.
Oops I meant Clarity, Honda's new plug-in hybrid.
It apparently qualifies for the $7500 federal tax credit. I haven't figured out when the credit applies. Best I can tell, it's when filling one's taxes, meaning I wouldn't see that cash until next year in April. That also means either shelling it out now or financing it. I might have to ask someone more knowledgeable to verify.
I think you’re spot on. One of the reasons I leased a leaf when I did is because when you do, Nissan recognizes the rebate immediately, and the price reflects that. At the time, the lease rate was effectively zero, and the post-lease sale price was higher than it should have been - so the delta between the price and the buyout was so small that the payments were ridiculously low. The best part was - they assumed the resale would be MUCH higher than it was, so they took a bath on the thing. I could have bought it for almost nothing at the end of the lease... but that’s another story for another day.
Your mileage may vary - pun intended - but yah... all tax breaks come in April of the following year... and you better hope you’ve got a tax bill of more than $7500 or you may see nothing of it.
It's a 2016 Impreza. As a tool I think it's fine. In modest snow it's incredibly solid. The seats flop down, and putting my bike in the back is a piece of cake. Just, grrr. The little things annoy me.
Notes from my first chess tournament (incomplete, but already a wall of text):
1. Chess games in tournaments are very long. Each player in a game is given 90 minutes, with 30 seconds added with each move. Most of my games were at least 3 hours long.
I was skeptical about being able to handle it, but it turns out that you spend all of that time thinking about the game. This is the type of time that just evaporates, leaving you wanting more.
2. I can tell that I'm hooked on something when I need to piss really badly but I still want to do the thing I'm doing. That day, I had a wonderful attacking position, my pieces preventing my opponent from mobilizing his own troops, the possibilities for a successful checkmate seeming endless.
I eventually rushed to the bathroom, but I was so lost in thought that I accidentally entered the women's restroom first.
3. The game of chess, in my mind (and at my level), is a three step war with yourself of figuring out when you're done calculating a line of moves, when you're done exploring new lines, and when you're done figuring out which move to ultimately make. This process is couched in your ultimate knowledge of the game, i.e. should I use the opening I'm more familiar with?, should I play for the tactics or for the position?, what is my plan right now?, etc.
The way I play chess mirrors the creative process I have when it comes to design- my first instinct is to do the cool stuff- sacrifices, tactics, ways to break the rules. I start by convincing myself out of these things until I get to moves that would be more reasonable for the position. But if I do find something that shows a glimmer of promise, I'll defend the hell out of it against my better judgement.
4. Because of how much time you're given, my strategy coming into the tournament was to come up with rules of thumb at the beginning of each game.
For my round 1, my rules were:
- Don't get distracted by the fact that you're playing against a 9 year old.
- Don't get distracted by the fact that you're playing in a tournament.
- Play so that you can learn something critical for round 2.
For round 2, my rules were:
- Take 10 seconds to breath before you confirm each move.
- Play the style of chess that you feel the most comfortable with.
- Don't get distracted by the fact that you're playing against a 9 year old girl.
5. Do not underestimate the aptitude of youth combined with scheduled practice. Children have an accellerated understanding of the language of chess- calculations, principles, tactical and positional ideas. You are simply a plaything in the maelstrom of their creative expression.
But don't forget- children are human. If they make funny faces at you, you are obligated to make funny faces back at them.
6. Sleep deprivation has a equalizing effect on my mind. Ideas, instincts, and doubts are all dampened so that they all feel similar. This has been helpful for me since high school for getting certain types of work done, especially creative efforts where I'm not sure where to start.
Being sleep deprived in a tournament game was a complete fiasco for me. Those instincts and doubts need to stay sharp in a long game, because I kept experiencing the dillenma where certain moves felt good even though I had already deduced that they were terrible. Make sure you get a good night's sleep.
7. I went 1.5 / 4, in an under 1800 rated bracket. I won my first game against a 1290, lost 3 games, and drew my last game after being offered a draw, against a 1190. There was only 1 game a day, I have no idea how people do 2 games a day, my mental stamina felt withered to the bone by day 5. I couldn't think straight by day 4, like I was in a cloud. The tournament was a lot of fun, and I did so much better than I thought I would do. I highly recommend entering a chess tournament if you get the chance.
Devac I'll show the games at request, I'm a little embarrassed/too lazy to put them in lichess after already going over the board with them
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I have less than one month left in Montreal. I don't really have a plan for afterwards, but I secured a really comfy contract, so I can travel. I'm applying to an internship for my favorite podcast, (in the same spirit as applying for Chessbrah), but I can't put all my eggs into this basket. Thinking about going to Brooklyn anyways. Or maybe giving Portland a shot.
Had a really rough yesterday after a really rough monday. Many thanks to _refugee_ for her listening ear and sage council.
Some of my nastier mental health issues have reared their head again in conjunction with my slowly worsening health.
Have an appointment with an assessment counselor after work to decide what course of counseling I will pursue.
Have an appointment with my heart failure doc next monday to go over my current status, trajectory and options.
Making a plan helps deal with fear a great deal. It's not a total solution however. I find myself tabbing back into my own medical record at work every few hours. Checking chemistry, re-checking measurements on this and that. Trying to see where I fit into various models of disease. Short version is that I don't. There aren't enough young people with this class of illness to have good data. Even if there were, from what I am able to discern, I am deeply abnormal.
I wish I had something more positive to say. My anniversary is in 12 days and I need to make a plan. On our first date we spent 12 hours just laying in a darkened room talking quietly. Maybe we will go get dinner and do that again.
Edit for something positive.
I biked almost 11 miles yesterday after not going more than 5-6 for weeks.
The first trip I took with my wife, I got us a room at the Sutton in Vancouver. We bought a bottle of Czech sparkling wine. And we stared out the window and talked, long after the bubbly was gone, just talking.
We still sit and just talk, a whole lot. The cork from the champagne has long since become a christmas tree ornament.
Hey hubski, been a while! To be honest I had completely forgotten this site existed until BLOB_CASTLE texted me today. Flood of memories. This place strikes such an excellent balance between other social sites--it's the best of Twitter (broad set of interests/content), Reddit (depth of discussion/comments), and Facebook (cordiality & familiarity) all in one.
About me, since then: happily (& newly) married, have a fun job in tourism marketing, working on some cool extracurricular projects, and doing a lot of woodshedding both solo and with a band.
Saturday
Went snowshoeing for the first time! On a mountain which my friend and I had never hiked before. A solid 14-mile round trip adventure. There was fresh snow at around 3,500ft from previous snowfalls, and nobody had been up the trail in probably two days. We didn't actually make the summit because we:
A: Made a navigational error that put us above where the trail really was.
B: Took too long to figure that out and
C: Didn't bring headlamps and had three hours to make it back to my car.
Still an amazing day, snowshoeing is so much fun!!!
Tuesday/Wednesday
Another climbing night last night. Went to a bar after and re-encountered a guy I had met there a couple of months ago. It's basically been the neighborhood bar since the 1930's and is my favorite bar out of any place I've lived in. But the interesting part: turns out this guy is an Olympic swimmer who has won medals. What are the odds? Good guy to drink with, too, maybe I'll convince him to go climbing or running with us.
Aaaaaaaaand I met somebody again. Date number one was Sunday, date number two is tonight. There was this moment where she was just looking at me. And I was looking at her. And there was silence. It felt like she completely disarmed me in that exact moment and I haven't been able to shake that feeling since. I'm excited to see her, and maybe more importantly I'm nervous to see her. I've complained about lacking that sensation here on Hubski and elsewhere but I very much have it right now...
The Run Down
Between all the above, ETH, and more, I've been thinking a lot about what I have earned, haven't earned but lucked out upon and where life is going. It's starting to feel like there's a guiding force that keeps putting me in the proximity of some incredibly interesting people, places, and scenarios. But ultimately, I have made the choices that have led to this, nobody has forced me to make these choices.
14 miles in snowshoes the first time out is great, especially with the elevation gain! So is turning back when necessary! Any hike that ends with all hikers safe and uninjured is a successful hike.
Any interest in a post to geek about gear? I know I'd enjoy discussing stuff.
Only four of the fourteen were with the snowshoes on! But it was great any way you dice it. A gear geek thread would be awesome! Gear, clothing, and training!
Training is a good one! I follow an Adirondack hiker forum, and the conventional wisdom there is that running isn't hiking. But some of my strongest hikes were during my marathon training or a month after the race. Maybe road running on comparatively flat areas isn't ideal for mountain hiking training, but it seemed pretty effective.
I'm considering signing up for another marathon in part to motivate myself to be in good shape for hiking.
Already Wednesday again? Oh, my god. Who knew having nothing to do could go by so fast.
I’ve been playing too many video games, which I tend to do over breaks, and usually kind of hate myself for, but it’s not all-consuming the way it has been in the past, so I guess that’s progress. I’ve also
- Written 5 more pages of my screenplay
- Written a full outline and the first 3 pages of a novel before deciding that I just don’t give a shit
- Started learning to play mandolin
- Continued working out and sometimes tossing around a baseball with my dad (holy shit I miss baseball)
And I decided to fix up my mom’s old bike. Replaced a tire and the saddle yesterday; now I’m gonna take the whole thing apart, try and get the rust off the frame, and repaint it. After that all I’ll have to do is lube the chain and maybe replace the front brake. Expect a full post with ~pictures~ once I finish.
Apartment hunting. So far unsuccessful - it is really fckn' difficult to find something in this cutthroat rental climate, especially because my best friend and I are a bit of an unusual case. But we're gonna look at something nice tomorrow, and if it doesn't have some major flaw we can probably get an option on it.
Also, I've been hauling a shitload of wood today with my dad for their fireplace. Friend of theirs cut down a few trees and had more than enough wood.
- I just don't know if I'll ever get used to the word "wife", she'll always be my girlfriend.
I am enamored of the word 'fiancee.' We really enjoy using it, especially around family who get a lil uncomfortable when they hear it because we are both the oldest children in our respective families.
Congrats on the office and chair. Comfy seats often come with inversely comfortable responsibilities. Hope things settle out and you're able to find the staff you need and a schedule that works for you rather than against you.
Motherfucker you snapchat me your dinner but don’t tell me you’re engaged??
Ha, sorry hoss.
What can I say? I don't feel any different, she doesn't feel any different. We've been having conversations related to it for a while.
We were talking with her little cousins around the holidays and one of the middle-school aged boys asked me all wide eyed 'Wait, you asked my cousin to marry you? What if she said no?' and I had to explain to him that you don't just ask someone that question out of the blue. You have to talk about it first and make sure you want similar things in life.
Silly rabbit. First off, CONGRATULATIONS. I'm glad neither of you feel any different. That bodes well.
Some helpful advice? The reason you don't feel any different is this isn't news to you it's news to everyone around you. A marriage isn't really a deal between you and your spouse so much as it's a deal between you and your spouse and society. As such, you will experience less friction if you look at everything through the lens of "what would my casual friends and family think?"
Which is not to say you aren't driving the bus... but how you choose to conduct yourself through this awkward engagement period is pretty much a choice as to how you wish to present the union to those around you. And societal expectations are pretty set on "don't bury the lede." It makes people feel awkward. Celebrations aren't for us, they're for the people around us and you don't want to deny people the right to celebrate with you (on your terms - but you have to give them the notice).
Also - don't go with the ring you want. Go with the ring she wants. TRUST ME ON THIS.
From what I know jewelry is largely designed in Rhino these days.
- Also - don't go with the ring you want. Go with the ring she wants. TRUST ME ON THIS.
You think my thick-fingered self is gonna draft this up solo? It's a very collaborative process. Collaborative in that she doesn't really care for jewelry and would just as soon stop by the courthouse on our way to pick up milk. My girl is all about meaning, could give half a fuck about the symbols used.
I've found that "wife" is the legal designation, and "my love" is the personal one.
"I'll ask my love if she's available on Wednesday..."
"My wife and I would like to apply for a loan..."
Just wait until you start wondering about the modifier my, and whether that sounds like you OWN her, or...
- Work is stressful. I barely have enough employees to cover our needs, So I'm picking up a lot of the extra hours. I have a LOT of different projects I'm working on and a lot of the small day to day stuff has gotten hard to handle.
This is my office even at full staff so I feel you. I have to write down everything I need to do or it won't happen and every time I look at my to do list it feels a little like I have fallen into a pit that keeps getting deeper no matter how hard I climb. Keep pushing and hopefully we will make it through!
I'm reaching the end of my holding pattern at work. My potential new boss flew to london to talk to my current boss about, among other things, my fate. It'll be nice to have answers, but I also really hate waiting. I should know by Friday.
My old boss also wants to meet up to tell me about jobs at her new company. I'll hear about those on Thursday.
Looks like I'll have to make some adult decisions soon.
Anyone have any experience using Stata? I barely got a grasp on R and Mathematica, now this shit. Difficulty level of this semester is fucked beyond imagination. I'm taking the hardest course series in my major (Econometrics 1&2) and I am an unhappy camper, although I am also a determined-to-succeed camper.
While giving blood yesterday I signed up to donate bone marrow and stem cells as well. I thought stem cells would a surgical thing like bone marrow, but it turns out they can take stem cells out of your blood! Needed to deposit some wholesomeness into my cynicism account.
Damn, I have more statistics this upcoming semester, and econometrics is on the not-too-distant horizon for me. Are you already in the middle of your semester? Mine doesn't start til 1/29.
Slipping back into the mess of the anxious worry about exams. The few quiet days after the New Year felt pretty good. I'm looking forward to getting back to the mindset once the exams are behind.
As the saying goes, it's not how many years in your life that matters but how much life in your years. This week has been particularly enlightening, mostly thanks to the select materials the good people of Hubski have posted. From "Ask Polly" to Sarah Silverman being the kindest soul, there have been many things to learn from this week alone. Few weeks are as bright for me.
I can't seem to find my place anywhere. I wouldn't even know what I'm looking for to begin with. I enjoy serious discussions that delve in-depth, rather than the shallow talks about who's more right that seem so prevalent around.
(I also realize now that I haven't had a personal conversation with anyone for about a year)
Rosa... Figuring out a fictional world and a story for fictional personalities is a long, dark process. It's walking in a thick fog without a clue for why you're there, let alone where you're going.
Meanwhile, I found a solution for another story that I wanted to tell for years now. Suddenly, I know what I want to write. It's a good story, though I doubt many people would be interested in it as much as I am. I'm going to publish it, but it's going to my personal website for free rather than into books for cash.
Writers of Hubski: I'm having trouble with the concept of receiving money for my art. Putting a price tag on a story of mine seems very impersonal and therefore deeply uncomfortable. If I could afford it, I'd rather just give all of my works away for free — but I wouldn't be able to, for the time I am to spend upon them. What do?
- Writers of Hubski: I'm having trouble with the concept of receiving money for my art. Putting a price tag on a story of mine seems very impersonal and therefore deeply uncomfortable. If I could afford it, I'd rather just give all of my works away for free — but I wouldn't be able to, for the time I am to spend upon them. What do?
You laid out the options yourself:
1. Surrender your morals and accept money for your work.
2. Keep your morals and give your work away for free.
3. Compromise neither and keep your work as a private, purely personal endeavor.
I purposely chose the word work over art. Art is something that's appreciated for its aesthetic qualities. The aesthetic qualities that resonate with an individual vary greatly from person to person; one may see a piece of graffiti as ugly defacement, whilst another sees it as a beautiful piece of artistic expression. An old neighbor of mine who's a retired painter once asked me show him some music which I thought was genius. He hated it and essentially said that it was dreadful fetishism of mind that had no soul.
As such, I feel it is a bit imposing to say to someone that you have created some art. You of course believe in its artistic qualities by virtue of the fact that you made it (well, hopefully you do.) But once you put it out there, for free or for a price, it is no longer defined solely by your interpretation. In fact, how you think of your work will matter very little to some.
So I'd let go of the romantic notion that you're creating art and instead perceive it as work. And just like anyone else's work, the result of it is a product, to sell or to give away. If you do sell it, any money you're fortunate enough to make off of it allows you to keep working (i.e. doing what you love). If people want to elevate it to the realm of art then that's great.
Feeling much healthier now that I'm more than a week removed from the madness of new year's. It's always impressive how much healthy eating and regular exercise (and probably most importantly, minimal alcohol) makes you feel human again.
Currently on a corticosteroid called Prednisolone which is causing me to be ravenously hungry pretty much 24/7. An almost permanent feeling of hunger is somewhat of an odd experience. I'll probably need to do a decent amount of exercise to counteract this.
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School
It's started again. Finding the right adviser made all the difference in the world. Counting the semesters, again. I only have classes two days a week, which freed me up to knock down once of my 2018 goals early.
Life
drumrolls Got a job offer! Part-time work that fits nicely when I'm not doing class work or in class itself. Don't think it will help pay for my place much out of school at this rate unless 100% goes straight to the bank - planning for at least 5% going to pocket, 15% at the most. Honestly, I didn't expect a call the day after - let alone between classes. Does it make sense to negotiate my rate up shortly after accepting? I ended with a couple dollars more pay in the last job I had in the field.
Relationship(s)
With the job part under my belt, I feel more confident heading back into 'dating'. So, I've made a commitment to push myself back out there.
On another note, I've been slacking on my relationship with self for a bit. My volunteer work has been nice tune-ups for a few years now, but I don't think I've done much to explore where I'm at now other than clearing shit that gets me out of myself. Naturally, being in a relationship can shed more light, so I have a more than a couple motives to move forward from where I've been romantically of late (nowhere).
Misc.
I completed my GIS project. Big thanks to kleinbl00 for the extra boost of information. I planned to post a stripped down version of it here (the final product was WAY too cluttered for my liking). I just need to google fixing the file address to relative for ArcGIS first. facepalm