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comment by kleinbl00
kleinbl00  ·  2409 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: August 23, 2017

From the outside? From any side, dude, by saying "I have a group run that night" you're saying "I have a group of friends I would rather hang out with than you and you are not invited." What you're saying is that running is more important than the girl.

Which, okay, know your priorities. But stop pretending it's the girl. Stop pretending that a girl as into exercise as you are would be any different because she'll have her own training plan and her own running group and her own routine.

A relationship is the additive result of a compromise. You're not willing to compromise. Ergo, you are not in a relationship.





Cumol  ·  2408 days ago  ·  link  ·  

As with WanderingEng, I am also glad that I stumbled onto this interaction here. It made me think about where I am standing and what I am doing. I spend my free time doing similar things as ButterflyEffect with running, climbing, playing poi and hicking.

I have been asking myself what kind of partner I want by my side and what you wrote made me rethink my view and maybe generalize it a little more.

The best relationships I had were with women that were able to discuss a subject without resorting to being mean, manipulations, or getting too emotional. Even thought we did disagree on some things, there was never the point where this disagreement would be the cause for a breakup. We acknowledged that we have different views and still valued our time together.

I haven't had such an interaction in a while now and I wonder when it will come again. I don't know how to summarize that into general terms of what my "perfect partner" would be, but at least it goes away from asking for shared hobbies or having specific views on subjects.