No. Taste is what one finds pleasing, and there are many reasons why one might prefer country to classical, say, or vice versa (upbringing, genetics, etc). They have nothing whatever to do with identity. If you're defining yourself by your taste in music, art, whatever, then you, my friend, are leading an exceedingly shallow existence (my apologies for being so blunt). There is definitely a lot to be gained by having similar interests insofar are you will enjoy doing stuff together, which I think is important (such that one needs to be friends with their partner, first and foremost, to be anything else). But some interests will converge and some diverge, and there's nothing wrong with that, unless you're looking for an accessory and not a partner. My wife, for example, is an amazing person. She is a beautiful piano player, and is a highly talented and successful artist, all qualities you might be attracted to. BUT, she also enjoys laying on the couch and watching The Kardashians and King of Queens. I can't be in a room where Kim Kardashian is on TV, so guess what? I leave. I don't see it as an existential threat. KoQ I find absolutely terrible and trivial, but it doesn't inspire the level of disgust in me than does reality TV generally and Kardashians in particular. But that just shows she's human. No one has high minded ideals all the time. I play hockey and occasionally even get in fights like a high school kid while doing so. Those are things she probably finds childish and low brow about me. These things make us more human.The choices and tastes of a person are a defining part of their identify. I do not believe, for instance, that the person shooting guns and listening to pop country and the person sitting in a coffee shop listening to Sam Beam are romantically capatible people.
I still don't know how much I buy into that. How can what a person enjoys, what they do as a hobby, what their tastes are, how are those things not a part of their identity? Is there not a tie between these things and deeper aspects of a person? (To which I say: yes) The identity is the sum of its parts and to simply ignore facets of if just doesn't feel right.
I don't think it's so much what you do/like but how you share that with somebody. Sometimes she'll do things she doesn't necessarily enjoy just to see you enjoy yourself and sometimes you'll do the same for her. I don't give a shit about guns but I love talking to my SO about them because I liked seeing how passionate he is. It's not necessarily the topic or activity you find interesting but the person in front of you.
Not necessarily, but there are certain topics I have zero tolerance for, and guns are a great example of that. If you own guns, support the gun industry and lobbying, then I flat out do not want to be intimate with you. As a person in front of me I have very little interest in you (see: judgmental comment in reply to bb). Granted, I have a family member who was killed due to gun violence, so that's an extreme example.
Oh I don't live in America and we don't really support how you guys do things. To be blunt thought you will likely have to work on the quick to judge thing you've seemingly got going on. You'll never like everything about a person and if you did you would probably get bored of them. A partner should be somebody who you can grow with and that's not really gonna happen when someone is exactly like you. Also if you are with them for being like you you won't like when they inevitably grow to be a different at different times from you.
I think (hope) what you're trying to say is that there are people who are sensitive to the world around them and people who aren't, and that you prefer the former, no? If so, I agree with you. However, the specifics are irrelevant. Only the most superficial aspects of one's being can be summed up in the way you suggest. Do you only relate to people who, say, have similar political or religious beliefs as you? Make the same amount of money as you? Eat the same kind of food as you? All of these things are skin deep at their deepest, and none is an example of a character trait any more than being white, black, Asian, or Latino is. Judging a book by its cover is bad enough. Judging a person by theirs...
I think I have too many trust issues to not be a judgmental person.