- “We look like a rich country from the outside, but mentally we have problems,” Maki says. She speaks slowly, methodically. “Japan is all about face. We don’t know how to talk from the gut. We can’t ask for help. So many people are alone with their problems, and stuck, and their hearts aren’t touching.”
Sherry Turkle spends a part of Alone Together talking about Japanese customs of respect and companionship. There's a whole industry of actors that look like you who will go visit your elderly relatives in nursing homes. Best part is when interviewed, the elderly relatives usually know what's up, but don't care because hiring an actor is a sign of respect.
I've actually got a Google News alert on Lesley Downer because this sort of stuff is what she writes about. Infrequently lately because she's working on a book, but stuff like this fascinates me:
- Kyoko, of course, is not the girl's real name. She did not meet Mr. A by chance and does not work for a design company, as he thinks. She is an agent paid to seduce him. She texts the team from her mobile and has a couple of GPS devices in case they lose her. Her bodyguard will move in if there are problems. And the whole operation is paid for by Mr. A's wife, who gets an illustrated report every time an encounter takes place. The aim is to have Mr. A fall so completely for Kyoko that he wants to marry her and asks for a divorce. Failing that, his wife will have a dossier with evidence of infidelity.
I feel like even though it focuses on why it works in Japan I could see this working anywhere in the world. A friend of mine used to do fetish sex work so basically she would get paid to let guys touch her feet, or just sit there and watch her smoke. She said most of the time they just wanted to talk to someone they knew wouldn't judge them. I guess it's easy to open up to and connect with somebody you don't really care about keeping around. I think that's why this rent-a-friend thing works as well; you get social interaction without all the pressure.
- She has been paid to cry at funerals and swoon at weddings
Sorry if this is covered later in the article. I've not finished it yet. Will come back to later. Fascinating stuff, culturally.
That was pretty interesting to read but I personally would never pay to have someone just to be my friend. I like the challenge of making friends on my own.