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comment by Isherwood
Isherwood  ·  2738 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Today's Writing Prompt: A Person and A Place

I like how the weather and space changes as Heather's morning progresses and she realizes what is going on. She also has a good character and makes the most out of her situation with that breakfast. It's a nice calm story.

I would read it out loud. My background is in storytelling so I always think about how things sound in speech and there are parts that felt a little stiff or lacked a little flow to me. Though, I feel like the fact that you're cranking these out every day can be a bit wearing on the writing muscle, so I'm just impressed the text is there.

user-inactivated  ·  2738 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Definitely could use some polish. With these I make an effort not to worry about anything too much so these are essentially first drafts off the cuff. Hopefully I can just practice more and develop my natural flow in a positive direction.

Isherwood  ·  2738 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I'll keep it in mind.

user-inactivated  ·  2738 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Don't go easy on me or anything. Your critique has helped to focus my efforts in developing that flow.