Adult seems hard to define in anything but biological terms, but on a more philosophical level, there's two moments when I've felt like an adult:
1. When I was able to see my parents as flawed. As a child I think we all have a built-in degree of admiration for most adults, but it's only in adulthood that you can see, sympathize with, and appreciate the flaws your parents have. You also work on not having or succumbing to these flaws.
2. When you realize that everyone is pretending and no one really has it as together as they like to appear. We're all just acting like adults, but all the props we have in life can be taken away.
3. It hasn't happened yet, but when my parents pass away I'll feel like an adult. Those are the only two people that have loved me in the way a parent loves a child and their no longer being around will have me thinking "this is it, I can never be a child again".
These are good answers rope. He said, "when you get older you realize that nobody knows how to act at these things." -Great advice and a big moment for me.When I was able to see my parents as flawed
It takes some time to recognize this. Not only this, but also grandparents. I was well in to my twenties before I realized that my grandfather was an alcoholic (although a jovial one) and my grandmother is obese. Neither of these things changes how much I love them, but they are examples of the ability for children to see their heroes as infallible. When you realize that everyone is pretending and no one really has it as together as they like to appear.
Wow, get out of my head! That was a big moment for me too. I went to a funeral of a close friend of my fathers. I was moved by how well my father handled himself at the funeral. I asked him, "dad, does it ever get any easier knowing how to act at these things?"