a thoughtful web.
Good ideas and conversation. No ads, no tracking.   Login or Take a Tour!
comment by user-inactivated
user-inactivated  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: What is your job, hubski?

I never read hubskina cause apparently 8bit had me in as a dude? and fuck that





lil  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Yeah, that was weird. I guess on the internet no one knows you're not a dude. To his credit, though, he gave you a dog. I don't think flagamuffin ever forgave him for making him a dog.

user-inactivated  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

on the internet nobody knows I'm more of a cat person

user-inactivated  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

he made me a fucking dog

user-inactivated  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

hush pup

am_Unition  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Are you housebroken?

_refugee_  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Sometimes I have been misgendered online and felt a strange sort of pride about it. Other times it has totally gotten under my skin. Hmm. I wonder where my line is.

lil  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I wonder if there's many female or almost female newbies in the recent migration. Mostly they don't want to identify though. But we should let them know that hubski has significant grrlski presence. (at least in my feed)

itssynecdoche  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Girl here. Following grrlski :)

lil  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

If you add hashtags on either side of the word, it will go to the list of items in that tag. #grrlski

itssynecdoche  ·  3209 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Oh great. Thanks for the tip :)

user-inactivated  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

it doesn't bother me so much on hubski because I don't exactly make things clear. but I'm not going to indulge it

_refugee_  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Sure, you should be gendered and represented as you identify and want to be gendered and represented. I understand that. I knew that I could relate to your feeling unhappy about being misgendered because I know I have corrected people and taken offense at their assumptions. But I realized I also have been misgendered and not minded or even felt good about that, so I was struck by the dichotomy. Sometimes I am deliberately obtuse about my gender and I think that is when I am pleased that people get it wrong. Sometimes I am open and state my gender and then I get pissed that they get it wrong. And then sometimes, middle ground.

I just hadn't really thought about that dichotomy before and was a little surprised to realize it. At any rate I can relate to being misgendered online and unhappy about it; and of course you shouldn't indulge it or any similar mischaracterizations that sit poorly with you.

cgod  ·  3210 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I feel greatful when I misgender someone and they correct me, It's not something I mean or want to do. There are many ambiguously gendered people in Portland and when all you are focused on is pouring booze in people's cups because there is a line to the door It's easy to get tunnel vision and go on instinct. I'm suprised at how gracious people are when they correct me. I do stop, make eye contact, if passing a drink or making change press their hand for a moment and say I'm sorry like I give a shit. I'm trying to let them know I mean it in the few seconds I have before I push on to the next drunk. The look I get back has ranged form a bemused "silly boy" to "it's really ok." If someone was pissed or hurt I wouldn't be at all suprised.