Libertarians love to point out flaws in our current system, as if anyone ever said it would be perfect. If you ever make the mistake of getting a libertarian started, get ready for an endless litany of what's wrong with our society and how it would be better in their capitalist, freedom-loving dream world of no coercion. The trouble is, they rarely reflect on what could go wrong in that system. If you ever need to escape one of these lectures, ask them to consider one of the simple, obvious scenarios below. You will probably leave them momentarily speechless, with a smug grin still frozen on their lips, giving you an opportunity to escape and find more enjoyable conversation elsewhere.

Drugs

With no restrictions on the drug market, recreational drugs will be widely consumed. Even wealthy celebrities will fall into the trap of addiction, and people will be regularly saddened by news of the premature deaths of beloved artists due to overdose. Some will claim that marijuana helps with their illness, but dealers will market their mind-altering wares to everyone, including the young.

And what on earth will prevent a crazy misanthrope from lacing popular pain tablets with cyanide, if not the fear of a watchful public police force and centralized justice system?

Alcoholism and drunk driving will be major health hazards. With alcohol for sale on every corner, college campuses will be notorious venues of intoxicated partying instead of sober academics. There will be no restrictions on tobacco use, and this clearly hazardous behavior will be commonplace, even if shunned by the majority. Cigarette manufacturers will omit warnings on their packages, lest they tip off their trusting customers to the danger of the habit. Less risky alternatives to smoking will be introduced to the market without any oversight or obstruction, and some people will be fooled into thinking these alternatives are risk-free.

With no controls on antibiotics, overuse and improper use will be rampant. People with no medical training will dose themselves with antibiotics even for viral infections where antibiotics are ineffective. Food animals will be dosed with antibiotics whether they are sick or not. This will inevitably lead to antibiotics-resistant strains of bacteria. This alone — the scandalous waste of one of the most important and effective tools in fighting disease — will inspire insistent and reasonable calls for a competent and effective agency for drug regulation.

Many people will be caffeine-dependent, and profit-minded drug lords will grow rich, callously exploiting them by charging as much as they can get away with to feed the addiction of their "customers" at gas stations, workplaces, airports, even schools and hospitals.

Guns

Firearms will be prevalent, and homicide and suicide deaths will be nearly as common as those from accidents. Proponents will claim that handguns are an effective crime deterrent and self-defense mechanism, but there will be no trusted, objective body collecting reliable evidence to evaluate the claim.

Gun dealers will have no reason to refuse a sale to anyone except the possibility of a wrongful death lawsuit, social ostracism, and censure from trade groups and suppliers. Rogue dealers will not even participate in trade groups, making secret deals in back alleys and dark corners. If a dealer sells a weapon to someone who meets industry standards for responsible gun ownership, and that weapon is later used in a crime, the dealer will be permitted to continue doing business as usual.

Food

When manufacturers and vendors have only their reputations and future profits to worry about, corners will be cut. There will be contamination scares and occasional outbreaks of food poisoning. Newspapers will breathlessly report on unsavory techniques used to sterilize meat, to public outcry. Nutrition labeling will be farcical, with no consistent enforcement. Breakfast cereal will be marketed like medicine. Foods and pills will be flogged for their alleged but unverified health benefits. Even proven frauds like homeopathic remedies will appear on the shelf next to legitimate vitamin supplements. Junk food will be marketed aggressively and available within arm's reach of most points of sale. When people are allowed to eat whatever they want, as if they were wild animals, obesity will soon become a significant health concern.

Standards and Measures

Fasteners will be unstandardized, requiring homeowners to keep multiple tools to simply tighten loose screws. Products like milk and soda will be sold in a variety of units, making cost comparison unnecessarily difficult. Even car speedometers will have multiple scales. The absence of a central coordinating body to decide on a standard system of measure will lead to costly engineering errors.

Science

Funding for research will be allocated not where it will do the most good, but where special interests direct it. Money will be wasted on pet projects of dubitable scientific value.

Institutions doing important work like cancer research will take the humiliating step of begging the public for donations to support their work.

Education

Institutions of learning will become profitable businesses, with the most prestigious schools charging ever higher tuition and accumulating massive endowments, while disreputable schools sell sham diplomas for next to nothing. Universities will solicit contributions from graduates to meet their budgets. Quality will be uneven: the poor will receive below-average education, while families with more means will compete to get their children into the best-rated schools. The best hope bright kids in poor families will have of escaping a poor future will be to have some business, family, or other institution pay for their education, even though they are complete strangers. A profit-centric business, donating money to help poor kids go to school, just because it's the right thing to do? Imagine seeing that happen in a profit-based fantasyland!

Transport

Infrastructure such as bridges, roads and tunnels will be frequently described as "crumbling." The private agencies responsible for construction and maintenance will invariably make excuses based on their budgets. As usual, the profit motive will mean that not a single dollar more than necessary will be spent on any infrastructure project.

Innovative companies trying to bring safer, cleaner vehicles to market will face barriers raised by larger, established brands.

High speed rail will serve affluent, densely populated regions, but poor rural areas lacking good transportation options will continue to go without.

Housing

Homelessness will exist in every major city, in the very shadows of luxurious highrises and skyscrapers. Poor people will be forced to rely on family and friends for support. Some will slip through the cracks and charity will not be up to the task of rescuing everyone.

Poverty

The poor will be with us. What a farce to imagine that the profit motive would ever concern itself with the poor, who by definition have so little money! Yet some heartless retailers will not be above scraping even these poor souls of their last cents, by selling them cheap, low-quality goods, while paying their employees (also poor) rock-bottom salaries to keep their wares within the pitiful reach of their impoverished customers.

The existence of poor people in our communities will be a rallying cry to institute a sensible government and eliminate the menace of poverty once and for all.

Crime and Justice

Market-based laws will be so ridiculously complicated even the agents charged with enforcement will not know all the rules. Different areas, even cities, will have different rules. Prostitution will be permitted in one community and banned in another. Law enforcement agents will take advantage of their authority, abusing innocent people, and victims will face an uphill battle seeking redress. Now and then an especially outrageous case will lead to a large settlement for the victim, but do you think the law enforcement company will be shut down? Of course not; it will be a simple matter of apologizing to the community, implementing better training and standards, and reassuring investors and customers that the mishap won't happen again. Only the most abusive, incompetent, and corrupt law enforcement companies would ever be forced out of business.

Poor neighborhoods, unable to pay for good law enforcement, will live in fear.

Most scandalizing, with law and justice beholden to the highest bidder, the wealthy will get a "better brand" of justice than the poor. We will watch in horror as the wealthiest criminals occasionally get away with murder!

Security and Privacy

It will be a common concern that the amount spent on defense against foreign threats is off by an order of magnitude. Our best realistic hope for peace will be to pursue friendly relationships with foreign powers by enjoying the mutual benefits of trade.

Criminals and terrorists will have access to secure communication technologies to plan their crimes without fear of anyone reading over their shoulders. People using technology services will be able to choose between companies which store personal and potentially incriminating data indefinitely and those which pledge not to keep it. Which do you think the bad guys will choose?

Air travelers will have to rely on airlines to provide safe travel. Lest we forget, the primary interest of the airlines is to profit, not to deliver passengers safely to their destinations. The decision to x-ray passengers' shoes will be left to marketers and accountants, and some airlines will gleefully announce a customer-friendly Keep-Your-Shoes-On policy. The only thing keeping them from eliminating security measures altogether is the fear of catastrophic terrorist attack, but such incidents are so rare customers will hardly be aware of them.

Asteroid impact, supervolcano eruption, and other natural disasters

We will be practically helpless against such threats.