I'm just trying to sort through a now confusing future and maybe win some sympathy points to take a bit of the shock away, so read if you want.

I mentioned in Pubski a month or so back that I'd be chosen as a finalist for a full ride scholarship at one of the colleges I applied to. The interview round was earlier this week, and results came out today.

If you can't tell from the title, I didn't get the full ride, though I did get about 1/2 off tuition as a sort of compensation/next-highest-tier deal. Which I strongly appreciate. I also strongly appreciate just the opportunity to be considered, and the fact that they offer 12-17 full rides a year. I also really enjoyed the opportunity to go out to the college (at their expense) and meet the other finalists, as well faculty, staff and current students at the school. The experience definetly made me reconsider ruling the school out if I didn't get the full scholarship. And the people who did receive it could not be a more deserving group, and I'm glad to have met and become friends with some of them.

I think though that even more than hoping for the full ride, I was hoping for the sense of security about my future. I'm not one of the people who would turn down a full ride at a school I find halfway decent. Now though, the decision is on my shoulders again.

I have a fantastic financial aid package from another school that would also give me some great career opportunities (a little bragski there I guess). But, I like the atmosphere less. And I know no one there. And while I'm sure I'll find friends easily enough, especially if I have hubski for my bitching to, I really like the people I met during the trip. And then the career opportunities might matter less, since I'm thinking about joining the Peace Corps out of college, and would therefore lose some of the connections and momentum I made in those opportunities. Yet, experience is experience, debt is debt, and the second school is the best for that.

But everyone, from my parents, to my friends here in Madison, to the friends who got the full ride, are telling me to go with my heart. I'm not sure where it points yet. It doesn't help that I'm still waiting to hear back from my top school, though at this point, major aid seems really unlikely and it's the most expensive school I applied to.

So yeah Hubski, that's where I'm at. It's rambling, it's petty, it's unimportant, but it's a life. Any specific or general advice would be much appreciated. Or you can chew my ass out for whatever you'd like. Or ignore this; I've had much worse happen to me.

Management edit: a quick little #bugski, mk, rob05c: the submission tips says a personal tag can be made by putting an "@" before the tag, but it only worked for me if I put it after the tag.