thenewgreen, you asked about self-defense training. This article stresses the importance of avoiding situations that lead to violence.

instruction in self-defense need not consume your life. The most important preparations are mental.

Unless you or another person is being physically harmed, or an attack seems imminent, avoiding violence should be your only concern.

Some of the advice is counterintuitive.

Strangely, carrying a weapon can make it much easier to ignore provocations... If you are armed, you cannot afford to be lured into casual altercations.

What if your attacker has a knife to your child’s throat and tells you that everything is going to be okay as long as you cooperate by lying face down on the floor? Don’t do it. It would be better to flee the house...