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elizabeth  ·  883 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: November 17, 2021

My sister's in town this week. It's such a stark contrast in lifestyle - she got married a few years back, just bought a condo in Toronto and is killing it as a PR person for Pharma companies in an agency. I bet she's easily earning 3-4 times my salary. She's super smart - I always tell my friends she's the person I could have been if only I liked following rules and decided to play the "career" game. She's winning the game for sure.

It's funny to compare and contrast, because I'm loving my life but like everyone I have my preoccupations. Most of mine are inter-relational stuff. Fluid relationship dynamics, very close friendships and fun projects are in the center of my life right now as opposed to career and money. And sometimes I wonder if I'm not just occupying my mind, with doing projects, maintaining and managing all these relationships just to keep busy. But then I have an amazing weekend with friends and would not trade it for the world. Feeling super privileged in my position, but sometimes quite disconnected from the "real" world since it feels not many people can allow themselves my lifestyle. Like I found a perfect little rare pocket of weirdness, and I'm scared ( or in a way, I know for sure) it won't last for too long. Life will change - and either I'll move on, or the people around me slowly will and I'll stay stuck in the times. Probably the former, but when the status quo is good, it's hard to not notice its fragility.

As a side note, was at at this lady's 50th birthday party last weekend. And TWO motherfucking (older) ladies just french kissed me without asking. Didn't feel too predatory, more of a boring housewife vibe, that used to be kind of attractive so is unaware of the concept that not everyone is happy to get their covid germs. Really irked me. And it's funny that I'm convinced a guy would have NEVER acted in this way towards me. My friend Erik (who is 45ish) actually stepped in to back me up after one of the ladies kept arguing with me that is was not about consent but "cultural differences" I did not understand since she's french. She didn't help her case - I might be more pissed at her assuming I'm not familiar with "cultural differences" as a well traveled person, born in Montreal that has gone to a Quebecois primary school, a French Lycée for all of high school, Russian school on the weekends and then an Anglo Cégep. URGHhh