I've been getting a few calls a month asking if I carry "White Coffee," which I don't and have no curiosity about. I'm sure it's a coffee fad that will mostly be forgotten in a few years.

A guy comes in the shop today with super excited eyes and asks if I have "White Coffee!"

"Nope, this is a traditional shop that eschews coffee fadism."

"Well I brought my own! Will you prepare it for me?"

I'd never seen it or tasted it, so what the fuck "I guess so."

He hands me a bag that looks like a bag of Bob's Red Mill white cornmeal, it smells like rancid coffee and something else that I still can't identify.

I make it pourover. It absorbs no water, it doesn't de-gass in anyway at all. I make sure to over extract it a bit to have a little left over to taste.

I chat with the guy a bit "I hate regular coffee, but I love this." Normally when someone says "I hate coffee!" I respond with "Well, you've come to the wrong place!" but I've had just about the shittiest week and didn't have it in me.

It smelled worse extracting than it does just sitting there. The flavor was acrid and grassy.

"I'm never doing this for you again sir, I don't ever want to smell this smell again."

I refused payment but suggested that if wanted he could drop a dollar in the jar.

Is "White Coffee" as bad as it seems? I love coffee but really hate fad bullshit coffee, I'm pretty sure that I wouldn't like the legendary good "White Coffee," but who knows.