I've had a similar train of thought when it comes to self improvement.

Take fitness for example, I've come to accept that on some level I just don't want to go through the process to become fit. If I genuinely wanted to become fit I would have no problem doing the research to come up with a diet + exercise plan that meets my needs and I'd stick to it. But because I don't stick to it when I come up with a plan, that must mean that I want leisure more than I want to go through the work it takes to become fit. Maybe I want to already be fit, but I don't want to become fit.

There was a piece of r/getmotivated style advice that made its rounds a while back that said something along the lines of "Replace the phrases 'I don't want to...', 'I don't have time to...' etc with 'It's not a priority for me to...'" I've found it to be a bit shallow like most of those little motivational catchphrases end up being when applied as a life strategy. However, I do think it's useful for a quick perspective change. Do you really want the things you say you want?

To bring it back to your post, the notion of there being an internal and external set of priorities resonates with me. I think it should be a goal to make them line up as much as possible. The question is how?