fistbump

Although you ragging on papyrus, and me thinking you meant the font (I have a soft spot for papyrus even though I shouldn't, does raise another point:

When you use "type-writery" things to communicate, you are abdicating layout, whitespace and everything else people who actually like to communicate with words hold dear.

Hey, kids - know how we used to insert graphics back in the typewriter days? Well first you found a black'n'white newspaper picture. Then you traced it onto a piece of paper where you thought it should go. Then you typed your shit being careful not to type past the lines. Then you taped your newspaper picture down. Then you went to the library and ran off some fucking copies because it's the goddamn dark ages and all that left-center-right-justified crap you click through like it ain't no thing? Yeah, you get to be mindful of that shit every goddamn word.

Oh, and fonts. You get one. It's the font. The fuck do you mean, what font? THE font. Unless you have a Selectric, but you don't, because you're a filthy hipster and while you adore the fuck out of this janky ass thing

somehow this is beyond the pale corporate bullshit

(notice how it's a "type style" not a "font" because what the fuck is a font)

and that only makes me hate you more.

Bitch, that's the tedious, pointless soundtrack of Mad Men and you know it. That circlejerk paean of an era you never really understood? "Office" is eight layers of Selectrics typing the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog as recorded in 1985. Got the samples.

I ain't gonna say shit about Dvorak, I just know that I like being able to type on other people's computers.

And I like being able to pick font, size, spacing, justification, word wrap, and all that other impossibly modern shit that used to be relegated to print shops. No, not the program, the actual thing, which for some reason you aren't hipstery about at all.

If fucking hipsters had any appreciation of art at all they'd all be off restoring pen plotters.