Honestly, I just don't believe that's what you meant with your original post. I think you just don't like the word because that's exactly what your original post suggested. Except you don't want to say that now so you took somebody elses opinion and are pretending it was what you meant the whole time. I'm not arguing with that person because they actually had a good point. So obviously when you pretend their point was yours I'm not going to argue against it.
I'm saying you should decompress because in a few days of being on the internet I've managed to know there was likely something wrong in your life. That should probably raise some questions about how you conduct yourself under stress.