I'm trying to decide whether to scale back or even end my friendship with one of my oldest and best friends.

We've known each other since school days and have always enjoyed each other's company. However, it seems over that last 3/4 years, they only really make an effort to maintain the friendship/contact when their life has gone to shit. They have always looked to me as someone they can spill their problems too whilst I simply listen. Or they often find my advice quite useful or supportive or whatever. I don't say this with resentment. I generally enjoy listening and giving advice where its wanted. I've had multiple people tell me I'm good at it so I try to help where I can. Who doesn't enjoy feeling wanted and useful?

But it just seems that when times are good for them, when things are going right and they're enjoying their life, they make little effort to stay in touch or meet up. Unless I make the effort to reach out or arrange something, I will hear very little directly from them. As soon as things start going sour though, the messages and requests to meet come flooding back.

And since I've started thinking about this, I've become acutely aware how much we don't have in common except for how long we've known each other. For the most part, we don't enjoy the same music, comedy, or taste in other media. We don't have the same outlook on life. We don't have a similar mindset on most thing. We just generally don't have a shared enthusiasm for anything. But despite all this I do feel there's a connection there in the good time and we enjoy each other's company. And of course, it can be good to be friend with people outside of your usual circle of interest, someone who challenges you or thinks differently to you. But in this case I'm starting to feel I'm being taken advantage of. I don't think it's anything purposeful by them, I just think that's how our dynamic has evolved naturally. And I feel it's becoming unhealthy.

I don't know, I am prone to over-thinking and blowing things out of proportion. I haven't quite processed this all yet to decide whether it's grounded in reality or not. This is pretty much just a stream of conciousness of the main irk on my mind at present.