You make some really great points, as always. I'm under the impression that forgiving oneself would be similar to forgiving another, but I could be wrong. I sort of answered your question of would I trust myself in the previous paragraph, but I'll answer it more explicitly. Maybe. So long as I feel the guilt of what I've done, yes. But living with that isn't worth it, and I'm coming to realize that. But in light of the previous paragraph, yes. I trust myself. I know I will not do repeat those actions. Positive thinking. Thoughts create reality. My fiance recommened the book The Untethered Soul and it has done wonders helping me realize how to move forward. It's not your average self-help book. It really is enlightening.If those people still love you, perhaps they are waiting to hear from you.
Those who I love most have already forgiven me, which is the strange part. They've forgiven me but I have yet to do so for myself. It's also about showing intention to do no further wrong.
This is a tough one. I've been using the guilt as my defense against doing further wrong. Sometimes I feel as if that's what's preventing me from repeating my actions. Although, I have been getting to the root of the issue and working on healing that part of myself. But it almost feels like I'd be jumping off of a cliff if I were to be in that situation again and had forgiven myself. But maybe that's where it is. To be certain I would make wise decisions regardless. To be so utterly confident that it wouldn't happen again. Hmm...that may have been an internal revelation.