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_refugee_  ·  3693 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Poems Are Easy Cuz They're Short

    writing poems is all about sticking to conventions,

Poems must rhyme. Viciously, fiercely, rhyme, and if syntax must be murdered to do it well BY GOD I'VE GOT THE TAR AND FEATHERS, LET'S GO! Sentence structure is only put there for prose, it's okay if I compeletely invert this phrase because I HAVE TO MAKE IT RHYME! Preferrably in rigid, rigid iambicor trochaic pentameter or maybe quadrameter but if you use those words to me I may just blink silently and then say "Bless you."

Couplets are the only acceptable way a poem can rhyme. Or maybe quadrains with 3/4 rhyming lines. Or maybe quadrains that consist of two couplets.

I should use the words "thee" and "thou" in my poems. Don't poems use that kind of language? I certainly should not use slang or current talk. In fact, poems should be Victorian in diction, through and through. No poetry has been written since the Victorian era. I must make reference to heaving bosoms and limpid pools. (The limpid pools are her eyes, duh.)

The things I write about in poems must always be pretty.

At the end of the poem I must make sure to tell you what my poem is saying, you know, to sum it up. For good measure I may do this three or four times. That's to make sure you really get it, see?