oh pubski things with girl a (girl from Dec.) I think I ended a few nights ago - told her I cannot be in a space with so much uncertainty, and no expectation of receiving any amount of affection/attention/affirmation, and not even knowing when i would see her again. that all of that is not a tenable situation for what i need and want. we ended with "let's figure out a timeline that's comfortable for both of us to reconnect over a cup of coffee or lunch in the future, and in the interim, not have contact". it was a challenging hour long conversation. i returned a couple of small things to her two days ago. but then last night she called me on facetime...i'm about to call her back to see why... girl b - surprisingly awesome date at one of the local spots to catch concerts, just hung out in the lounge/bar and walked around for a while after. soooo much in common. made out in the streets at the end of the night. seeing her again tomorrow night, and i kind of want to try and take things slow with her, i feel there could be potential to build something with her. trading music suggestions over text messages the past couple of days. girl c - also a fun climbing night date, going to see her again after i go on this trip to canmore, alberta, for a week of ice climbing. she's a bit older (6 years older than me) and seems to have a different perspective on some things. it's very unclear at this moment if she's looking for a climbing partner or more than that, but i'm fine with either. edit: girl d - also fun, not as physically attracted to this person I don't think(???), but super interesting, very mountainous, and is an underwater photographer for the smithsonian??? (have i mentioned all of these girls are very intelligent, driven, etc.) so, i'm managing...it's been a very challenging, emotional month of january. i've had a lot of anticipation for girl a, and now trying to not make the same mistakes twice with girl b in particular, and have also had a lot of anticipation for this trip to canmore. where it's looking warm, almost too warm...highs in the mid-30s for ice isn't super great... somebody asked me what would be my ideal for all of this dating. it made me uncomfortable to say "i want a relationship". trying to unpack why that is.
I am more invested in your emotional health/dating success than I expected to be. I really hope things work out for you. But I do think you've handled the 'Girl from Dec' saga as best as you could. You went in excited, hopeful and willing to be malleable, can't ask for much else. Sounds terrifying. Are you scaling a wall like normal climbing, but it's also ice?for a week of ice climbing.
It was a good experience for me to seriously think about what I want from a person and relationship. I do, however, remain bummed about how that conversation went down and how it feels like I saw two very different versions of the same person. Going to talk to therapist about that. It will be terrifying and will look like this! https://www.mountainproject.com/route/107112924/grotto-falls But I'm also going with this guy (and a bunch of others): https://www.outsideonline.com/health/training-performance/steve-swenson-mountaineer/
God, I'm glad you enjoy it. I wondered about picking up climbing, there's a cool venue in my city dedicated to it and those I know who do it, absolutely love it. Scaling shit? Exercise? Mad forearm pumps? Hell yeah. Would my weight be a struggle, do you think? I'm certainly fit in a general sense, but I know climbing is something else entirely. I'm like, 95kg usually and I can do pullups with ease, but not sure that would transfer well to actually climbing a wall. I assumed I'd have to lose weight and drop my overall strength to actually do it.
Unsure! How tall are you?Would my weight be a struggle, do you think? I'm certainly fit in a general sense, but I know climbing is something else entirely. I'm like, 95kg usually and I can do pullups with ease, but not sure that would transfer well to actually climbing a wall. I assumed I'd have to lose weight and drop my overall strength to actually do it.
You’ll be totally fine. Unless you want to be a world class climber, you can get up some very challenging, engaging, and/or just plain fun stuff at a gym and outside with your build. Strength will be really helpful but it’s a lot of technique, flexibility, and muscles that you don’t use in a lot of other scenarios.
I'm no climbing expert, but i've once seen a beginner (as in never climbed in her life) lady absolutely brute force up a wall and leave all other beginners in the dust - looking like an absolute beast stuck to the wall all muscles engaged the whole way. It was impressive. Climbing is lots of technique actually so while strength and flexibility are a factor, i feel anyone generally fit can get a start. The easier routes are almost just going up a ladder type exercises.