I'm afraid the general rule is "If in doubt, they're probably a time waster", but then it's not exactly easy to tell. I hope it works out for you, dude. Which it will, either way.
Agreed. She had given the heads up that there were serious projects for her in the (then) coming couple weeks, yet I figured 3 weeks worth of benefit of the doubt after the third date was generous - where we are now. When it came down to it, I would have settled for at least some reciprocation when it came to making plans for later during that time period or a week after. Deflections without follow up for alternatives is a bit disheartening. Overall, I'm with you though. Here's to the next go around working out.but then it's not exactly easy to tell.
Here's the cold, hard truth: It's easier, psychologically, to not confront people. It's harder, socially, for kids these days to confront people. Yeah, it's shitty to ghost but it's not like she needs you to have a good opinion of her. Don't expect people who aren't into you to treat you with common courtesy. We don't live in that society anymore. Do not confuse a lack of social signals that were last en vogue in the '90s to guide you in your travels.
Even people who do like you (platonically or otherwise) will miss this, aware of it or not. Struggling with this very much right now, thanks Sherry Turkle...Don't expect people who aren't into you to treat you with common courtesy. We don't live in that society anymore.
Here's the funny thing tho The more self-esteem you have, the easier it is to deliver bad news to someone else. The more self-esteem you have, the more likely you are to date other people with self-esteem. It's almost like the people who schlub you like that are schlubs, and if you don't want to be schlubbed, don't date schlubs. I recognize that the pool is often shallow, and we seek any port in a storm. But there are better people out there, and they treat people better as a matter of course. If you can convince yourself you're worthy of their attentions, you are.
Edited for clarity. Meant it has been 3 weeks of benefit of the doubt and not much talk, etc. For now, I'm definitely not interested, but open to revisit after a while. She's totally new to the area and into outdoor adventures. Once the weather cools down, I thought canoeing in nearby springs would be nice, if ever.