My second list is not filled with concrete items like the first list. It's a bunch of directions I want to take my life to. It spans years, not days, and sometimes takes just as long to form as it takes to finish. When I have some time to reflect (usually on long train rides), I reconsider, adjust or change course.
I find this fascinating because I'm the opposite. My first list is very much long term directions I want to go, but my second list seems to consist of entirely too much video games and beer drinking time. I suppose it's a good thing that I'm somewhat aware of the second list at all, but I continually live with the feeling that if I really wanted the things on the first list I would study more and play less.
Perhaps you do want the things on the first list because you've been told that they will give you the things on the second list, only more sustainably. What do you get from video games and beer drinking: feelings of success and smartness and altered states, and you can get it cheaply and quickly. For a while.if I really wanted the things on the first list I would study more and play less.