Goddamned Canada Goose

    Thanks a lot, Canada. These fuckers are considered a pest species. Why? Probably the noise, droppings, aggressive behavior, and habit of begging for food in urban parks. Oh, and then there is the incessant honking, and their long, stupid necks… Basically, everything about these birds makes you want to choke them.

    Goose Tip: Feeding the geese at the park? Be aware that they can become overly aggressive in large groups. If you have to fight, don’t let them surround you– keep moving and try to take them on individually or in small groups.


This is fantastic. Thanks ButterflyEffect.

Two tangent related stories.

Field Guides

Growing up my parents had bought a ton of field guides over the years, for birds, reptiles, fish, insects, and we even had one for dinosaurs (which you have to admit was cool, even if it was for real). I remember going through them, even before I was able to read, just because the pictures were so well done. I don't know if I still have any, so when I get back in the house I'll go through my books and see if I have any worth sharing.

Canadian Geese

This weekend, Dala and I were taking a walk in a park that had a huge ass fountain with three Canadian Geese in it, one standing guard on an electric pump and two swimming right next to the wall. We were gonna walk within spitting distance of the two by the wall, so I figured I'd try and be a gentleman and walk between Dala and the geese, while still giving as wide a berth as possible. We kept on walking, not making eye contact with them, and as soon as we pass them I could hear one of the fuckers jump onto the wall right behind me with a flap of his wings. True story. I didn't flinch. I swear. No, I ducked my head, hunched my shoulders, and took a double step forward to get the fuck out of the way. Fucking goose can have the whole damn wall for all I care. I got nothing to prove.

posted by ButterflyEffect: 366 days ago