Share good ideas and conversation.   Login, Join Us, or Take a Tour!
galen's comments
galen  ·  1 day ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: It's been too long! Book thread time. What have you been reading?

Remembering is hard, so let's do the ones currently on my desk and in my backpack.

I went through a bit of a Baseball Books phase:

The Only Rule is It Has to Work is about two statisticians who basically take over the front office of an independent baseball team and try to make a ridiculous, rule-breaking, experimental but stats-driven success story. It mostly works, but the stories and the humanity that come along were the real championship all along. Fun stuff.

I re-read The Art of Fielding. This was my 5th time through. It's so good.

Bang the Drum Slowly is coming along... slowly. It's entertaining, but I'm not sure how much is there. It's also a bit difficult (gross?) sometimes to read about professional jock culture in the 1950s. Especially when it comes to race and gender. Oh well.

School and school-related books:

Reading Hartmann von Aue's Iwein for a class in literature of the middle ages. We're also translating parts out of the Middle High German ourselves, so that's fun. I love Arthurian novels.

I've been marching through William Carlos Williams' Paterson since seeing the film Paterson and then seeing some of his poetry on my syllabus for American Pragmatism. It's alright. Not a huge fan of modernist poetry but oh well. The film was good.

And finally, I made it through a book I've been meaning to read for the past 230 days:

Gerald Murnane's The Plains. Hard to describe, harder to understand, but an absolute joy to read. Honestly, read the Times article from that old post. They describe Murnane way better than I could. All I can add: his work stands up to their praise. I started on Inland last week.

galen  ·  3 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: 308th Weekly "Share Some Music You've Been Into Lately" Thread

Absolutely deserved. Swimming was my rap AOTY before his death, and winning a Grammy would be a wonderful way to honor his legacy.

What

sorry for ignore

…what is passing here?

Editing: Well, to me it looks that you are should buy more of beans! Double beans. One beans for the girl to bake all now, and one beans for you to do the normal. So now every time you buy bean, buy just two bean! Solution.

veen  ·  5 days ago  ·  link  ·  

are y'all having a collective mental breakdown or wha

am_Unition  ·  5 days ago  ·  link  ·  

t?

Yes

bhrgunatha  ·  5 days ago  ·  link  ·  

How many was? How many beans make 5? A bean, a bean, a half a bean, a bean and a half and a bean. Good by horse.

galen  ·  5 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: December 12, 2018

I think, sometimes, the things that make life worth it aren't relationships, or religion, or some kind of higher moral calling, but just those tiny, almost imperceptible moments of random human connection, even with strangers.

--

I was just coming home from work, standing in the tram, and I started idly tapping on my legs, just kind of practicing drums without even realizing. At some point I started playing along to McCoy Tyner's Passion Dance in my head, and I got to a part of the groove that I really struggle with, and ended up playing it over and over, trying to get it right. Suddenly in the middle of this, something caught my awareness. I looked up and to my right, and saw a probably 10 year old boy sitting next to me, intently watching me practice. He saw me seeing him, and looked away shyly; but once I also looked away, he started very, very quietly, but very distinctly—at least for me—to beatbox. I half-smiled uncontrollably. The tram stopped, he walked past me, and he got off, but for a minute there, it felt like we had our own secret club, that only we knew about, where only drummers were allowed. I hope he went home and started practicing. I know I'm going to.

zebra2  ·  5 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Beans make life worth.

galen  ·  8 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: 308th Weekly "Share Some Music You've Been Into Lately" Thread

Ooh hell yeah just caught this one on the radio at work

galen  ·  8 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: 308th Weekly "Share Some Music You've Been Into Lately" Thread

Indie rock!

Hip hop!

Jazz!

darlinareyousleepy  ·  3 days ago  ·  link  ·  

I can't believe that Mac Miller is finally nominated for the Grammys.

galen  ·  3 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Absolutely deserved. Swimming was my rap AOTY before his death, and winning a Grammy would be a wonderful way to honor his legacy.

galen  ·  8 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Ooh hell yeah just caught this one on the radio at work

galen  ·  10 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: People who have moved out of parents, how old were you when you left?

I was 16 when I moved into my first dorm across the country, but still stayed with my parents during the summer until this year. I guess that means I moved out when I left the country, a month before my 19th birthday.

galen  ·  12 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Why Are Gender Reveal Parties a Thing?

    You're right, it's more of a "sex reveal party" technically.

But nobody calls it that, and that's the problem.

    I don't think it has anything to do with how the child will later identify, more about their present sex status. I have no doubt that if it was technically possible, people would do "eye/hair colour reveal parties". It's a redhead! And if they grow up and wear lenses/dye their hair purple - that's all good too.

By calling it a gender reveal party, you're making it about gender. Not to mention the colors, the "it's a boy!" balloons, the whatever else is there-- it's all about gender, not sex. And yeah, obviously, this doesn't impact the baby. But a parent who so early celebrates their child's assumed gender identity, purely on the basis of the child's sex, is a parent who will be less receptive to a child that later identifies in other, "unexpected" ways.

steve  ·  12 days ago  ·  link  ·  

please help me understand the current definition of "gender" vs. "sex". Somewhere along the way, I feel like the definitions have evolved, and have gained some emotional gravity that I'm ignorant about. I don't want to go around offending people by using the wrong term in the wrong way. (and I'm being completely genuine and vulnerable here).

Quatrarius  ·  12 days ago  ·  link  ·  

it's a silly example but it helps me remember: back in the day pink wasn't associated with femininity and it wasn't a gender-related thing, but somewhere along the line pink became associated with one gender and suddenly little girls like pink

they aren't born liking pink inherently, they're encouraged to like it by society - in contrast they aren't encouraged to have ovaries and shit like that, they just have it

the characteristics of sex are the characteristics of sex; gender is anything you want it to be because it's arbitrary

Quatrarius  ·  12 days ago  ·  link  ·  

the gist of it is "sex" is what you are from a reproductive-y, chromosome-y perspective and "gender" is the role you play socially - e.g. little XX humans don't pop out the womb as "female", that's the set of behaviors / expectations 'n' all that that get placed on you when society sees you have a vagina

people are born as whatever sex they are and get assigned a gender associated with their bits, then later their "gender identity" (their own sense of what set of behaviors / expectations align with them) develops and either matches the gender assigned to them or not

people that have a gender identity = assigned gender match are cisgender (although that word isn't well liked sometimes)

people that have a gender identity =/= assigned gender mismatch are transgender

I personally don't think that "gender reveal parties" matter one iota for reference but if you wanna be finicky then yeah "sex reveal parties" would be a better name - who gives a shit frankly

galen  ·  12 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: California 2084

In lieu of an answer, here's wileyfoxes 81 days ago:

    I also need to learn what is appropriate for this site (for instance, can I post a novel I am trying to write)

so I'm guessing that they did write this :)

galen  ·  13 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Why Are Gender Reveal Parties a Thing?

    About the transgender standpoint, maybe I’m talking out of line here, but gender does matter! If it was all inconsequential, there would be no queer movement. Celebrating that you’re going to have a boy does not mean you will not be supporting them in whatever gender indentity they will later identify as.

Nobody here is claiming that gender doesn't matter, though! You're right, gender is clearly not inconsequential. The problem is that gender is a socially constructed category into which people place themselves depending on how they identify. So when you get the word from your doctor that your unborn baby has XX chromosomes, you still have no idea what gender they will have. Celebrating that as proof that your child will later identify as a girl only reinforces unfounded societal expectations that their gender identity must correspond with their genitalia (which does kind of imply not supporting them if they identify with a another gender identity later)! At best, celebrating what genitalia your child will have is pretty weird; at worst, it's deeply transphobic.

elizabeth  ·  12 days ago  ·  link  ·  

You're right, it's more of a "sex reveal party" technically.

    Celebrating that as proof that your child will later identify as a girl only reinforces unfounded societal expectations that their gender identity must correspond with their genitalia (which does kind of imply not supporting them if they identify with a another gender identity later)!

I don't think it has anything to do with how the child will later identify, more about their present sex status. I have no doubt that if it was technically possible, people would do "eye/hair colour reveal parties". It's a redhead! And if they grow up and wear lenses/dye their hair purple - that's all good too.

People just want stupid milestones to celebrate their babies coming into the world.

galen  ·  12 days ago  ·  link  ·  

    You're right, it's more of a "sex reveal party" technically.

But nobody calls it that, and that's the problem.

    I don't think it has anything to do with how the child will later identify, more about their present sex status. I have no doubt that if it was technically possible, people would do "eye/hair colour reveal parties". It's a redhead! And if they grow up and wear lenses/dye their hair purple - that's all good too.

By calling it a gender reveal party, you're making it about gender. Not to mention the colors, the "it's a boy!" balloons, the whatever else is there-- it's all about gender, not sex. And yeah, obviously, this doesn't impact the baby. But a parent who so early celebrates their child's assumed gender identity, purely on the basis of the child's sex, is a parent who will be less receptive to a child that later identifies in other, "unexpected" ways.

steve  ·  12 days ago  ·  link  ·  

please help me understand the current definition of "gender" vs. "sex". Somewhere along the way, I feel like the definitions have evolved, and have gained some emotional gravity that I'm ignorant about. I don't want to go around offending people by using the wrong term in the wrong way. (and I'm being completely genuine and vulnerable here).

Quatrarius  ·  12 days ago  ·  link  ·  

it's a silly example but it helps me remember: back in the day pink wasn't associated with femininity and it wasn't a gender-related thing, but somewhere along the line pink became associated with one gender and suddenly little girls like pink

they aren't born liking pink inherently, they're encouraged to like it by society - in contrast they aren't encouraged to have ovaries and shit like that, they just have it

the characteristics of sex are the characteristics of sex; gender is anything you want it to be because it's arbitrary

Quatrarius  ·  12 days ago  ·  link  ·  

the gist of it is "sex" is what you are from a reproductive-y, chromosome-y perspective and "gender" is the role you play socially - e.g. little XX humans don't pop out the womb as "female", that's the set of behaviors / expectations 'n' all that that get placed on you when society sees you have a vagina

people are born as whatever sex they are and get assigned a gender associated with their bits, then later their "gender identity" (their own sense of what set of behaviors / expectations align with them) develops and either matches the gender assigned to them or not

people that have a gender identity = assigned gender match are cisgender (although that word isn't well liked sometimes)

people that have a gender identity =/= assigned gender mismatch are transgender

I personally don't think that "gender reveal parties" matter one iota for reference but if you wanna be finicky then yeah "sex reveal parties" would be a better name - who gives a shit frankly

galen  ·  16 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Weekly Photo Challenge: Rule of Thirds

I can't decide if the strong lines of separation on the ground are oddly satisfying or deeply unsettling.

Small point, compared to the "Jesus fucking Christ what is going on in this world," but it's Acosta on the AG shortlist, not Epstein. And by the way, Acosta's already in charge of the Dept of Labor, which oversees regulations against human trafficking.

cgod  ·  18 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Ooops, of course it's Acosta not Epstein.

It wouldn't surprise me if Epstein was nominated for Commerce Secretary when Wilbur gets the boot!

galen  ·  19 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Pubski: November 28, 2018

I've been avoiding making a third appointment with my therapist for quite some time. Basically, he highly recommended that I find a GP and a psychiatrist here, and I was too freaked out to make those two calls, so I just didn't schedule another appointment with him either. Today I finally got off my ass and emailed him to explain the situation. I'm hoping we can start working on my social anxiety as well as depression, and move forward from there. He hasn't replied yet, but fingers crossed that I can get an appointment relatively soon. I also still have the book I borrowed from him, so, y'know, he has incentive to respond :D

I started talking to my recent ex again after about 2 weeks of no contact. I think we can seriously transition into friendship in a way that seems healthy for both of us, which is cool, because we both still really care about each other and enjoy spending time together. It's only been a day or two, so we're still figuring it out and figuring out if this is even gonna work, but I hope it does. I could use another close friend.

Can't wait to go home for Christmas! Less than a month and I'll be back in Texas. Fuck, I'm really excited, guys. And all my friends are gonna be there at the same time as me, most of them with a bunch of free time. It'll be a cool two weeks.

galen  ·  20 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Palm oil was supposed to help save the planet. Instead it unleashed a catastrophe.

Friendly tip: if you're going to ask silly easily-answered questions, don't get surprised and annoyed when you get a simple spelled-out answer.

If you don't understand how palm oil creates an environmental catastrophe, try reading the article above, which is about how palm oil has created an environmental catastrophe.

galen  ·  22 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: 306th Weekly "Share Some Music You've Been Into Lately" Thread