making friends + meeting people
doing well in classes
feeling happy and confident, about myself and the things i'm doing
gone on a date with somebody (verdict: just friends)
gone to my first futbawl game (verdict: the student section is fun, but standing for 3 hours on concrete makes my feet hurt)
got invited to a linguistics research lab thing by a professor (verdict: very excited - first meeting on friday)
This is the happiest (and most consistently happy) that I can remember being, if not ever, then for a long time. I see no reason for things to get worse, and a lot of reasons for things to get better in the next little bit / the future.
(it's amazing how much easier things are when you consistently have energy and don't hate yourself)
Life is goodski.
baseball is the most zen of sports - not "Zen" in caps, but zen all lowercase
you go to a baseball game because you want to sit outside for a couple hours and enjoy the weather / think about nothing in particular, and sometimes something mildly interesting happens and you get to participate in the group happiness of a stadium full of people entertained by a home run or a clever bunt or something
baseball is the game you take your kids and your grandkids to to eat some popcorn or peanuts or a hot dog or something, and get ice cream after the game
you can enjoy baseball on any level of understanding of it from "jack shit" to "nate silver", and that's okay, because actually going out to see a baseball game is not really about the game
that's why there are 10 thousand games per season and they play through the summer is because baseball is about slowing way down and enjoying little things in the moment you experience them
the "exciting" part of baseball is in the playoffs so if that's your goal just wait until then
there's an unaffiliated minor league about a half hour away from here with 4 teams and one stadium - they have a little plaza with food vendors and a playground, and there's a grass hill in the outfield that you can sit on and watch from, and they have little gimmicks to get people there like fireworks and a dog that gets the bats, and there's beauty in that experience that's really important
there's baseball happening in the middle there but the important part is everything on the edges
i was thinking a few seconds ago and i'm going to call these people "thought daddies"
a thought daddy is some guy (they're almost always guys) aged >30 with a college education, generally white (or off-brand white) - they can be gay, but they aren't normally, and the crucial part is that they're all writers or scientists. if they're a scientist, their specialization basically doesn't matter at all
because all thought daddies have big thoughts about the whole world, and they write so many books, and they know why everything sucks so much (there are no optimist thought daddies)
and science fetishists cluster around these people because they're just opinionated turbonerds with power, as opposed to them (the powerless ones)
i don't understand why cynicism means you have to take people at face value when they say they have all the answers - when somebody tells you "i'm the rational, right one and the people that disagree aren't logical," doesn't that set off some alarms? why are these people exempt from questioning? just because they say they're right? because they confirm the beliefs you already have? i'll never understand that
was freud right all along? is it a father figure thing - they fit the dad mold so well, they're so comforting with the answers, sometimes they have beards
i guess it doesn't matter too much in the end
"don't report on it, it encourages them" is the "just ignore it and they'll stop bullying you" of the gun control world, and it's a reddit comments section-tier analysis of the situation
i wish i could spit on an opinion
There are two problems.
I like to call the first one (since right now, when I made it up) CONTROVERSY-AS-DISCUSSION. CONTROVERSY-AS-DISCUSSION (CAD) is what you do when you have no news, but you have to write about something otherwise you don't make any money. Here's how it works:
1. Take any divisive social issue (race)
2. Find someone who has an opinion about it (megawhitey)
3. Feed the opinion into the media ouroboros
4. KEEP FEEDING
You can write articles debunking the original opinion, articles debunking other articles, hot takes, thinkpieces about thinkpieces --- going on forever. Nobody would care about what this guy had to say if it wasn't used as ammunition by these people. They're pretending to report on something that they made up out of thin air. Internet journalists are the agents of controversy (megawhitey knows this too), so this story gets picked up by the right-wing sites instantly - but I'll get there.
Look at some of the titles these articles have around the time this started to take off:
Right away, it gets called a manifesto. This random guy's craziness is a manifesto? Is it that important? Fuck you.
SECOND PROBLEM: It's not really crazy. It's pretty mild. It's not really right, either, but that's not the point. When things like this get drawn into the culture war, they immediately get painted as extreme.
(here on hubski, we're smart, we're moderates, we don't buy into the system, man, we know that this guy isn't a nazi)
But now this guy is hanging out with a lot of wannabe nazis smart scientific gentlemen. Dangerously/occasionally reasonable-sounding gentlemen. I'm assuming this guy wasn't a crypto-fascist, but maybe just a regular (friendly) conservamoderate? You know - the kind that shakes his head at how dumb these kids can be about race and sex, but doesn't quite tip over the edge into being alt-right?
(he'd have to be alt-right because he's too young to be rightright)
Now he's been driven into the arms of these people. Because he probably thinks he's right, right? He probably thinks all he was doing was making a reasonable point, with !!science!! and !!analysis!!, and he's getting shouted at by ev-er-y-body with a blog/twatter/"journalistic position" on the internet. Except for the fine fellows at
The Daily Wire
Jordan Peterologist the Canadian Psychologist, INC
n'all that. Because they're taking him seriously, and not shouting at him, and calling his critics crazy liberals obsessed with political correctness. Which is what he was talking about in the first place.
SECRET THIRD PROBLEM:
Could we talk about diversity without sparks like this setting everything off, almost like we care?
I didn't use my CAD abbreviation at all after I defined it, too. That could be the fourth problem here. The fourth problem might be this comment as a whole.