Ha! Here I was last week, saying I don't want to get a job, and now I've been hired on a short term, part-time contract for some basic social media management. It's funny how life works out sometimes. It's some super easy work, pretty good pay and I can go right back to government money once they stop paying me out in 6 weeks. It's a little funny that the organization I'm working for is a Cultural/Religious Community, that I only tangentially belong to and have never had any intentions of participating in. In big part because having grown up in a multitude of immigrant communities of the city, I'm too aware of how toxic it can all get very quickly. As someone integrated in Canadian/Quebecois society, I don't feel the need to find belonging with people from my origins. And these social spaces while useful and reassuring to new immigrants, to me feel claustrophobic and disingenuous. In their aim to help and support newly arrived people, they often also trap them in a bubble, an alternate reality of our society. Not to mention my lack of belief in their religious convictions.

But... this organization seems sincere in their ambition to help, have places for kids and adults to meet and find community, learning opportunities, good deeds and all that. I don't mind doing this work for them, I feel it's not my place to judge anyone's beliefs and everyone I have met so far seem very nice. I just feel a little guilty for being an outsider I guess? While i'm helping them, I'm motivated by money and would not be doing any of it otherwise. I'm not very used to work on things that I'm not passionate about, where I have a detachment from the work. I think it can be a good experience - being very emotionally involved with my work is my usual thing, and it can affect my mood in other aspects of my life. Maybe i'll find out a little distance is good? Maybe i'll hate it? Let's see how this goes!

I'm just a little... offended? when my mom was proud of me for getting this job. I feel i'm massively over-qualified, and am doing much harder and more meaningful things with the non-profit. I don't make money - but that's a choice, not that I don't think I can land a job at some corporate office and start earning. This work is almost like supermarket-level grunt work for my industry, and it just confirms to me she doesn't really understand what I do or who I am or what I value :(