The LS offends me so much. Same bore, same stroke, same intake size, same exhaust size, zero parts interchangeability. It's like, fuck's sake, people. It's 2008. DOHC that bitch for once and for all you choads.

I might be reading Wikipedia and recalling things wrong, but I'm pretty sure the LS is a pushrod V8 (pretty certain it's a descendent of the same block design as the 350), so it can't be a DOHC because the camshaft is inside the block. To make a DOHC would mean they'd have to design a whole new engine block.

Pushrods are kind of GM's thing though. Mazda has their rotary engines, Subaru has their boxer engines, and GM has pushrods. I mean, yeah, you can't get as rev happy with them but they're small, light, easy to modify, and that's why everyone loves to do LS swaps. If a car has an engine bay, there's literally a good chance the LS can fit in it. They're wonderful engines that sound absolutely amazing and easily produce pants wetting amounts of power.

The fix would have been to throw Corvette TPI on the fucker to begin with but back then that was outlandishly expensive and bourgeois as fuck.

It's been 20 years now. You could probably source parts pretty easily to build the engine 17 year old you would want. So you ever find yourself tempted to go back and work on the car some more?