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user-inactivated  ·  3110 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: What do I do with being lonely?

    Is this superficial socialization? Maybe.

Never meant Hubski. Here, people discuss topics they care about and show exactly how they feel. To call this superficial is to be gravely mistaken.

What I meant was talking about stuff that matters for nobody for as long as it may be discussed. Who really gives this much shit about an exercise being so difficult? If one does, one best to revise their priorities - and this is how you define superficial socialization. I don't want to talk about crap with people who exist merely as a physical shell - I want to have meaningful conversations with those who do exist; I want to interact with interests and be impressed or disappointed by what is real.

That you managed to gather in reality and still have a good enough conversation is a miracle, let's not kid ourselves. Hubski is a small circle of people who genuinely care for one another and the topics discussed, and there aren't a lot of those around or at all. I'm glad to be a part of it and I'm happy for you fellas. Maybe it's as rare for me as I imagine, or maybe I just close myself to opportunities with others because I'm terrified of being vulnerable; either way, you had what I may not be able to.

It's not to say I don't have to try, but - it's fucking hard to. I can spill my soul to you because you're an online entity for my mind's care, and talking to real people is so much more difficult. Again, not to say I won't try. Gotta keep the effort up, I suppose, and stand up once fallen.

And - yeah, talking about it helps. Thanks for the opportunity.

    and remember, if the universe can create someone like you with your values, goals, and experiences, the universe can create someone for you.

I know. Hard to remember that when you're disappointed in someone once again, at least for me. I tried putting my faith in too many people this time, just like I did when I first attended university. The first time failed miserably because I persisted in getting to know those people despite them having no interest in me or even outright rejecting me. God damn my mind's crazy. Currently doing my best not to fall into the same trap again, as well as trying to find people to spend good time with.

Thanks for letting me get this off my chest. Now I'm getting back to studying: if the people business is going no good, studying - in a damn university - won't let me down, and damn it's good to feel prepared and knowledgeable.